


Pavement Cracks

by defying3reason



Series: Pavement Cracks 'verse [2]
Category: The Flash (Comics)
Genre: Domestic Violence, F/M, Homophobia, M/M, Pining, Shower Sex, Voyeurism
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-01-13
Updated: 2015-01-28
Packaged: 2017-11-25 09:01:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 30,071
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/637256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/defying3reason/pseuds/defying3reason
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>It's the early days of the Flash Rogues gallery, and their youngest member finds himself inexplicably drawn to the Pied Piper, despite the presence of a short tempered thug of a boyfriend.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I started writing this fic forever ago, and at the time I was intrigued by writing sex scenes, but not confident enough to post them. When I initially posted this on ff.net I edited out most of the sex scene (which is just a good idea when you're posting to the pit anyway), but now I feel confident enough to put the scene back in as I initially wrote it (I did fix it up a little though!) So anyway, if you're already familiar with the series, the first chapter is pretty different from what you already read...

When Piper went to bed the previous night, dragging his feet in exhaustion and groaning whenever he held his shoulder at a bad angle while triumphantly clutching a bag of loot, he'd been alone. When he woke up the next morning to warm breath hissing out ocean sounds on his ear there was another body curled up alongside him. His instincts kicked in and he suddenly shot up, elbowing the other person in the face.

"Oof!" The intruder fell off the bed and landed on the floor with a dull thud. Piper crouched at the head of the bed, where he pulled a flute out from under the mattress and poised it at his lips, ready to defend himself. Then he got a good look at the intruder.

"Trickster! What the hell are you doing?" He took a deep breath in an attempt to quell the adrenaline rush before reaching out a hand to help his sometimes-colleague to his feet.

"I was checking up on you. I was just trying to screw with your dreams a little. You didn't hafta elbow me in the face." Trickster rubbed at his jaw and fixed Piper with large blue puppy-eyes. It was actually a little bizarre to see his eyes: Piper was used to seeing James Jesse only in full costume, which included a domino mask. That, and he was sporting a black eye.

"You scared the crap out of me. I was completely within rights elbowing you. Why were you checking up on me?"

Trickster shrugged. "You looked pretty out of it last night. And then Flash knocked you out that window and into that dumpster. I dunno. I just figured you might need some company today. I would've helped you home last night, but I got into that Mario Kart play off with Mick, and when I finished you'd already left. So…you okay?"

"My shoulder's sore, but I'm fine," Piper said around a yawn. He stretched his arms over his head and let out a little groan as he cracked his back. "What about you, James? Flash tapped you pretty good, didn't he?"

"Yeah, but I had ice on my eye most of the night. How's the bruising look?" Trickster asked. He leaned over, not that he needed to. His left eye was a vibrant shade of purple and slightly swollen. He also had a bump on the jaw that was starting to match, courtesy of Piper's elbow. He felt a little bad about that one, even though he hadn't meant to hurt the other Rogue.

"Well it's a very lovely shade of purple," Piper put in, once it became clear James expected an answer.

"Damn it. I was hoping it wouldn't show. Oh well. So why were you so zonked out yesterday anyway?" Trickster plopped onto the foot of Piper's bed and hugged his legs, resting his head on his knees and regarding Piper with an almost-innocent looking gaze. Piper inwardly groaned; anything close to innocence on James' features meant trouble. Piper suspected a con-in-play.

"I wasn't aware I was particularly zonked out." Piper stood up and walked across the room to his closet, sifting through it for something to put on. He was distinctly uncomfortable having a conversation with this particular Rogue in his bedroom, wearing only a thin t-shirt and a pair of boxers. He hadn't told the Rogues he was gay, he wasn't planning on it, and damned if the young, cute blond was ever going to find out what Piper really thought about him.

"You totally were. C'mon Piper, I'm a con-man. I know how to read people and I know how to find things out, so you might as well just save me some trouble and tell me what was up. It's not like you to show up for a job distracted."

"Did Cold put you up to this?" Piper asked, accusation out of his mouth as soon as the thought occurred to him. He was halfway through putting on a green jersey when he turned to face the Trickster.

James sighed, and draped himself dramatically over the end of the bed. "I can't just be concerned for a friend of mine? I have to have an ulterior motive?"

"Yeah, you do," Piper said with a scowl. "I've been miserable pretty much my whole life and you've known me for almost a year of it. You've never checked up on me before, nor have I you. We're not that kind of friends."

"Yeah, Len put me up to it. He was worried you might blow things in the future, so he told me to find out what was wrong, and either help you fix it or you're out. Apparently emotional turmoil is like drugs. Too much and we're done." It was Trickster's turn to scowl. "Frankly, I'd rather ditch Boomer than you. The guy's a douche and he's always putting his foot in his mouth. You're fine most of the time."

"I appreciate the vote of confidence." Now dressed in a jersey-t and ripped jeans, Piper began the search along his dresser for a hairbrush and elastic. "It's not really a big deal. My roommate left yesterday and I didn't see it coming so I was just…shaken. That's all."

"Your roommate?" Trickster asked.

"Yes…"

"This is a one bedroom apartment," Trickster pointed out. Piper glared at him. "So if you mean your girlfriend broke up with you, you can just say it."

"Fine, my girlfriend broke up with me."

"I'm sorry dude. How long were you guys together?" Trickster asked, surprising Piper with the apparent sincerity of his tone. Then again, feigning emotions likely went hand in hand with conning. Still…Piper really had wanted a sympathetic ear for his misery, though he didn't have anyone he trusted enough to turn to.

"We were a little over a year." Piper finished pulling his hair into a ponytail and joined James on the bed, sitting down heavily and resting his hands on his knees.

"Why'd she leave?"

"Found someone else."

"Oh, dude, that sucks. You know, we could always pay her and her new guy a visit. Scare 'em a little."

"That won't be necessary, James."

"You sure? Cuz, I mean, I've got this new bubble gum trick that's totally not even a little bit lethal, just really annoying, and Mick knows how to do some cool shit with his fire that won't even singe her, but she might lose her eyebrows-"

"Really, James," Piper said, cutting off the babbling super villain. "It's fine. I'm…my relationships don't tend to go well. I'll probably be out of my funk in time for the next job, and if I'm not then I'll sit it out. You can tell Len that I won't endanger the Rogues, alright?"

"Yeah, yeah that's fine. Um…so whaddya wanna do? Do you wanna talk?"

"Um…why? Do you want to listen to me whine?" Piper asked, surprised.

"Eh. I mean, honestly, no. I'd rather cheer you up by committing felonies together in spandex. But you totally seem like the thoughtful type, so I figured you'd rather talk," Trickster explained.

"I…I do kind of want to talk. I don't really have anybody to, but, well…"

"What?"

"It doesn't feel right. No one ever wants to listen to what I have to say," Piper mumbled.

Trickster grabbed one of Piper's pillows from the end of the bed, hugged it to his chest and flopped over, kicking his legs out behind him in perfect imitation of a bubby teenage girl. "Well you've got a rapt audience. So what was your girl's name? What was she like? Was she pretty?"

Piper bit back a laugh at his earnestness and flopped alongside his companion. Indulging a little bit of Trickster's curiosity was probably safer in the long run than trying to shut him out entirely. If Piper could satisfy the guy’s curiosity, he wouldn’t go digging around on his own. "Her name was Maxine," he lied, "and she was a pushy, passionate bitch. She was very pretty, otherwise I probably wouldn't have put up with her bullshit."

"Sounds about right. Personally I don't do the monogamy thing very well myself. I've never tried living with someone before. How'd that go?"

"Not very well. Neither of us are very domestic, and the more time we spent with each other, the more we pissed each other off. It just seemed convenient. When I don't work with you guys, I work with Ea-Maxine."

"Ea-Maxine?" Trickster asked with a smile.

"Well I didn't always call her Maxine," Piper covered, too quickly if the look on James' face was any indication.

"So Maxine's a costume too? Would I have ever bumped into her?"

"Probably not."

"What's she go by, you know, for her villain name?"

"Hasn't picked anything yet," Piper lied. He didn't know if Fury had enough of a rep for the others to have heard of him yet. "Look, James, maybe this isn't a good idea. The relationship only ended yesterday. I don't think I'm ready to talk yet."

"Obviously. If I wait until tomorrow night you'll have a whole story worked out, right?" James asked. He sat up and leaned over Piper to get a good look at him. "Now, I could be wrong, but I'm willing to bet my entire stock of rubber chickens that a woman hasn't been living in this pit of an apartment. So if you don't wanna tell Cold what's really up, that's fine, but dude, I am actually here as a concerned friend and not just a cohort. You can tell me."

"You don't think women can be slobs?" Piper asked.

"Not to this level. This is a guy's house. Plus there's no girly shit for her to need to come back and pick up later in the week. No clothes, no candles, no feminine hygiene products or books or anything. And in my experience, usually the girl throws the guy out. So, I have made my case. You're lying to me. I wanna know why." Shit.

'He's treating this like a game,' Piper thought sourly. Perhaps mercifully, the frustrated and tired supervillain was saved the trouble of needing to come up with a better story by the sound of a key in the lock of the front door. Forgetting the Trickster entirely, Piper shot off the bed and ran out into the living room. He stood anxiously behind the couch, wringing his hands, while Earl stomped into the living room.

His eyes were bloodshot, his hair was a new state of scruffy, outdoing all its previous attempts at defying gravity, and he looked irritable, but Piper was still happy to see him. Earl had left in a mood, and really it was a relief that he hadn't picked a fight somewhere and gotten himself killed.

"Earl…did you, did you change your mind?" Piper asked, after almost a full minute of Earl just staring at him. He kicked the door closed behind him, dragged himself across the room and pulled Piper close for a rough kiss. 'I really should be pushing him away,' Piper thought as he fisted a hand in the dirty grey t-shirt Earl was wearing and whimpered.

"You really are stupid enough to take me back, aren't you? Even after all that shit yesterday?" Earl rumbled quietly, tracing his fingers down the side of Piper's face.

"Well, um, well it's worth talking about."

"Yeah, I guess it is. But m'not in the mood to talk right now. Need a shower, need some sleep. C'n you…can you be around in a few hours, Hart?"

Piper nodded without thinking. Because he was an idiot. He'd caught Earl cheating on him, and it's not like the guy had treated him that great before that either. In fact, if anything he seemed to enjoy the fact that he could get away with so much and Piper would still take him back. Earl may very well have been trying to see where the line was, if one even existed.

"Good, good. I'll talk to you later then, okay?" He ran the pad of his thumb over Piper's lower lip, and leaned in for another kiss. Then he let go and stalked off for the bathroom. A moment later the shower turned on.

Piper hugged his arms and kept his focus on the front door, so he wouldn't have to turn around and see James staring at him from the bedroom doorway.

"Dude…"

"I, ah, I'd rather not…um…"

"Dude, you really taking Maxine back?" James asked. Piper turned around and gaped at him, because that hadn't been close to what he'd expected.

"Don't _judge_ me! You don't even know what's going on!"

"Well I didn't think you were lying about the infidelity part of your story," James said, leaning against the doorframe. "I mean, it all reeked of bullshit, but from the look on your face, I figured someone had left you for another guy at some point. So Earl cheated on you?"

"Um…yes."

"Ah huh. And what's he gonna say to make that okay with you?" James pressed.

"It's none of your damn business," Piper ground out. He opened the front door and waved an arm, indicating James should leave. He didn't budge.

"Look, Earl didn't seem like the type of guy I want one of my friends dating. Now sure, maybe I happened upon you guys at a bad time, but he looked like the ass end of a dumpster and even he agreed that he doesn't treat you right. Throw the bum out!"

"Trickster, really, my personal life is none of your business. There's a reason I've never told any of you thing one about it, and I don't want to start talking about it now."

"Dude, you said Maxine was pretty. That dude with the stubble and hair worse than Mark's, he wasn't very pretty."

"Well obviously I don't agree with you. Besides, you're not seeing him at his best," Piper pointed out. James rolled his eyes.

"He looked like a douche to me. I don't want you dating a douche. You can do better."

"I like doing Earl, now will you please leave?"

"I'm surprised you're rushing me out. I mean, I just found out for sure that you're gay. Aren't you worried about me telling all the guys?" James said, switching tracks. Piper's face fell a little, because he'd been terrified of the prospect, but he stood his ground.

"Of course I don't want them to know, but short of hypnotizing you into forgetting the entire morning, I don't think I have a way to stop you if you really want to. Look, James, I need to at least hear him out. This has nothing to do with costumed villainy. I said that if I wasn't good for a job, I'd hold back, and I may have been beaten up a little more than usual last night, but I was still good for my end. So will you…can you please just let me handle this?"

Piper put a hand to his forehead, hiding eyes that were rapidly watering. He leaned against the wall, allowing the door to swing shut, and took a deep breath, trying to pull himself back together. He jumped when he felt a hand on his chin, tilting his face up. James was standing next to him, chewing his lip thoughtfully as he looked into Piper's eyes. Absently, he reached into his pocket and handed Piper a tissue that had rubber duckies printed on it.

"I'm not going to out you, but so you know, the guys have started guessing at it anyway. Look, um, could you just call me later, or swing by or something, and let me know how it goes? I guess I want to be that kind of friend."

"O-okay. Um, yeah, I can call you." He wiped at his face with the tissue, a good dodge to keep from having to look up into surprisingly concerned blue eyes that were still plenty mesmerizing despite the fact that one was surrounded by a swollen purple bruise.

"Cool. See you later then." James wrapped Piper in a quick half-hug before cheerily making his exit, leaving Piper alone in his living room and fairly confused.

The sound of the running water brought him out of his daze somewhat, and he dropped the tissue on a cluttered end table before knocking on the bathroom door. "Earl…?"

"Yeah?"

"Um…can we, can we talk before your nap?"

"Can't hear you, Hart. C'mon in," Earl called. Piper sighed, but walked into the bathroom anyway. He stood next to the shower curtain.

"Can we talk before your nap, if it's okay?"

Earl pulled back the shower curtain, presumably so he could look at Piper, but in the process he also gave him quite a view of a soaked, well-muscled body. Piper's eyes wandered a moment before coming back up to Earl's eyes. Grinning, Earl tugged Piper into the shower, clothes and all.

"H-hey! Earl!" Piper yelled, trying to hop back over the side of the tub, but Earl held him firmly at the waist and he really was a lot stronger.

“Uh-uh Music Man, m’not letting you go.” Earl held him closer and started kissing the side of his face. Piper's skin tingled from the abrasive brush of stubble. Earl shifted, pinning Piper’s back to the tiled wall, and started kissing along his jaw and throat. His hands pushed up the saturated fabric of his t-shirt and skimmed along Piper’s stomach, long fingers tracing along his hip bones and dipping under the hem of wet denim and cotton boxers.

“Earl, st-stop, we need to…” his half-hearted condemnation gave way to a throaty moan that had Earl laughing at him. Embarrassed, but undeniably turned on, he decided to go with it. Earl was a strong proponent of make-up sex; if Piper wanted to talk to him, his best chance was to sneak in his main points during pillow talk.

Piper pulled off his shirt and threw it out onto the bathroom floor, where it landed with a wet splat. Earl’s hands roamed over Piper’s torso, leaving tracks of red where his fingertips dug into pale flesh. Piper groaned, leaned closer and kissed along his collar bone.

“Earl…” Piper mumbled. Earl snaked a hand into his jeans. The wet denim was chafing against his sensitized skin, but Earl’s strong, calloused grip felt incredible around him. Earl yanked Piper’s pants down to give him more room to work. Piper clung to Earl, sure he was going to lose his balance and kill himself in their tiny shower.

In more than one way, it was nice to have someone to cling to.

“M’gonna fuck you so hard, Hartley. I never should’a left. Not gonna do it again, promise,” Earl babbled, barely audible above the roar of the hot water, while he furiously worked Piper’s erection. Piper rested his forehead on Earl’s tanned shoulder while his hips involuntarily jerked into his lover’s movements. “God, you’re so fucking hot,” Earl groaned. He changed tracks, sliding Piper’s jeans the rest of the way down so he could kick them off, then reached behind him and turned off the water.

“Earl…” Piper gasped, whimpering at the temporary loss of contact. Then Earl pulled him into an embrace and captured his lips in a heated kiss. He lifted Piper clear up and carried him from the bathroom, legs wrapped around Earl’s waist, still kissing each other breathless.

* * *

Meanwhile, James had taken up a post on a neighbor’s fire escape. He’d pulled the blinds up and opened the curtains before leaving the bedroom, and so had a pretty decent view of what was going on in the bedroom now, especially after having fished binoculars out of his pocket. He watched the two estranged lovers enter the bedroom, dripping wet and curled around each other, and watched as Piper was flung violently onto the mattress with Earl following after, crawling along his body kissing, sucking and biting at the pale, slippery skin.

James couldn’t help but wonder how Earl had managed that seduction less than twenty four hours after getting caught cheating. That took skill.

James felt a nagging tightness in his stomach watching the two of them. He’d never once gotten off thinking about or watching a couple of dudes before, and where he wasn’t exactly turned on per se, there was something hot about it. Hell he’d never seen his friend have so much fun before, or look quite so open.

Piper sat up on his elbows, grinning as he locked eyes with his lover. Earl said something, James wasn’t good enough at reading lips yet to figure out what, and then Piper took out his elastic and shook his partially-wet hair out. It was damned erotic, and much to James’ surprise he found himself starting to get hard.

‘Huh. So Piper’s a little hot. Who knew?’ He shifted his position and focused his binoculars to get a better look.

Earl pulled Piper to him for a rough looking kiss. The stupid jerk was giving Piper a horrible looking case of beard burn, not that he seemed to care about ravaged skin at the moment. Earl tangled his fingers in Piper’s hair, yanking his head this way and that, crushing him into the mattress, and then he pulled something out from under a pillow.

“What is tha…” James trailed off. It was a little tube, partially rolled up at the bottom. Earl flipped the top one-handed and squeezed some gel onto his fingertips. Then he shoved his fingers up Piper’s ass. “Oh, ew! Wait, is that fun or something?” James watched Piper drop his head onto Earl’s shoulder…it looked like he was moaning. Earl had him positively writhing in under a minute, although at that point he was jerking him off too.

“Huh. Clearly I have a lot to learn about gay sex,” James mumbled to himself. It looked a little rougher than most of what he preferred to engage in, but Earl certainly wasn’t doing anything Piper didn’t seem to enjoy, so he supposed he’d fulfilled his purpose in checking up on his friend (Earl reeked of being an abusive boyfriend, and James was damned if anyone was going to beat a Rogue on his watch). Still, he didn’t move from the fire escape.

‘Might as well finish the show,’ he rationalized.

Earl was up to three fingers at this point, and as the guy had particularly large hands, that was an awful lot of stretching. He seemed satisfied with it though. James watched as Earl pretty much picked Piper up and dropped him over by the pillows, and James squashed an irrational burst of panic on his skinny friend’s behalf. Why the hell did Piper have to be dating someone so much stronger than him? If Earl wanted to, with Piper that vulnerable in the heat of the moment, he could really do some damage.

 Earl wrapped one of Piper’s long legs around his waist, squirted a little lube onto his hand, palmed his cock, positioned, and then entered Piper in one forceful thrust. It didn’t look very pleasant, and certainly wasn’t the most gentle of sex moves, and for a second James was tempted to strangle the asshole. However, he didn’t move after the initial harsh thrust, except to push some damp bangs out of Piper’s face and ask him if he was okay (James was competent enough at lip-reading to pick up that, at least). He waited until Piper nodded, then worked up a rhythm, stroking Piper off as he thrust. James’ pants got distinctly uncomfortable watching from that point on, because Piper had the most expressive sex-face he’d ever seen, and it was _hot_. Earl’s, on the other hand, well, he looked like he’d gotten his genitals caught someplace much less pleasant than a bendy and willing redhead. Even though his pace was brutally fast and his hands were less than gentle, Piper was undoubtedly enjoying it. Whatever other failings Earl may have had, his bedroom skills were certainly a credential.

The lovers came within seconds of each other. Earl cleaned them both off with a corner of the sheet, prompting Piper to lightly smack his arm and stick his tongue out, but then they curled around each other and the radiant little smile on Piper’s face was nothing short of blissful.

"Alright asshole, but you'd better keep him that happy," he muttered darkly. He hopped off the fire escape, lightly ran through the air down to the ground level, and found himself a payphone. He reached into his pocket until he found a napkin with a phone number scribbled on it.

"Hey, Kimberly? …yeah, this is James, that guy you met at the bar the other night? …hey yeah, you doing anything?...ooo, I like that answer…yeah, you get a nine for creativity…yep, ten point scale…cool, where do you wanna meet?...yep, okay, see you in a bit."

* * *

"You're awfully snuggly today," Earl noted, a pretty sappy smile on his face. Piper's face was buried in his chest, so he didn't notice, but some of the idiotic smile had made its way into his voice so it didn't really matter.

"I didn't think I'd get the chance to do this again. Pleasant surprise," Piper explained. He breathed in deeply, loving the sweaty, soapy mix that signified shower-sex.

"Yeah. I shoulda known I wasn't gonna last long, trying to give you up. You're damn addictive…Just fucking perfect."

"Then why'd you walk out on me?" Piper asked. He propped himself up enough to look at Earl, who promptly turned away, facing the wall. "Earl? Come on, I deserve an explanation."

"Yeah, well…I just didn't like how damn jealous you were getting."

"Jealous? I caught you with your hand down someone else's pants. By rights I should have been throwing you out," Piper pointed out, bristling indignantly.

"We're supposed to be cuddling, not threatening each other. You wanted me back." Earl didn't bother phrasing it as a question. The other crook had been plenty pliant towards him since he'd gotten back to their apartment.

"Well yeah, of course. I care about you. But, well, I mean…I dunno what I mean. I shouldn't have to explain why I want to be the only one you sleep with."

Earl sighed, still not looking at Piper. "Look, Hart…you're a pretty amazing guy, but I just…I mean I'll try not to sleep around, but I'm probably gonna anyway."

"Why?" Piper asked, not having expected the brutal honesty and taking it like a slap to the face. He'd almost rather have been lied to.

"Ida know, it's just what I do. I've never dated anyone before, I mean not like this anyway. Never tried living with anyone or anything. It's hard…and sometimes I just end up really wanting to hurt you."

"Earl, why would you say that?!"

"I don't know, it's just the truth! You always make me wanna tell you the truth too…I can't lie to you, Hart. Ida know, I'm just an asshole."

"Can you just be my asshole then?" Piper asked in a small voice. "I really don't need that much from you, Earl. I mean, it's nice when you're romantic and thoughtful, not gonna lie, but if I ever catch you cheating on me again then it's going to get awkward with condoms and blood tests and the like. I do care about you, but not enough to die of AIDS with you."

"Alright, alright. I fucking hate condoms."

"Baby. They don't make _that_ much of a difference."

"Well then one of us is using them wrong, because I fucking hate them," Earl insisted. Piper shrugged it off, because it wasn't worth getting bogged down in a stupid argument over. Even the seemingly little arguments with Earl were capable of escalating into major blow-outs.

Although what did he really expect, dating a fellow super villain? Of course their relationship would be screwed up. They were by definition screwed up people.

'It'll get better though,’ Piper told himself as he snuggled his boyfriend. 'Earl said he'd change, he's not going to cheat on me again. It'll be better.'


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things get worse. Piper leaves.

**Chapter Two**

"So how'd talking to Earl go?" James asked brightly. He was air-walking along the top of a chain-link fence, prompting several passersby into staring to see how he was balancing himself. A ridiculously incredulous looking old man with a comb-over provoked a grin out of Piper, who was walking along the sidewalk with his hands in his coat pockets.

"It went pretty good. He promised not to cheat on me anymore."

"That's good, I suppose. So you took him back?"

"Yep."

"Ah…so you're dating a short tempered supervillain-"

"James, I'm a super villain too. Besides, how do you know Earl's short tempered?" Piper asked pointedly.

"Educated guess. But I'm usually pretty good with these things. Besides, am I wrong?" James shot back. Piper hesitated, and James smiled triumphantly. "I knew I smelled a short fuse."

"Look, he doesn't hurt me-"

"Physically," James interrupted.

"He said he's not going to cheat anymore."

"And you believed him because…?"

"Because I told him that if he did we'd go back to using condoms."

"Oh. So you agreed to keep sleeping with him when he does cheat on you again, just in different circumstances," James pointed out.

"I…well I…oh hell, I did, didn't I?" Piper realized. "Well, it doesn't matter anyway. Earl hates condoms, so he won't cheat on me again. James, really, he's not going to cheat on me." He was clearly addressing his own insecurities more than the Trickster.

James hopped down to the sidewalk and squeezed Piper's good shoulder. "It's okay dude. If he does, then we can get rid of him and make it look like an accident. Mick's a talented arsonist, Mark can make Mother Nature look responsible, and Len can frame Mister Freeze or Killer Frost. Really, there are tons of options."

"You don't need to kill him. I can take care of myself," Piper insisted. "Besides, if you were going to enlist the aid of any of the others you'd have to tell them why you wanted Earl killed, and I still don't plan on coming out to the other Rogues."

"But dude, I'm telling you, they already pretty much guessed it-"

"But they don't know for sure and I'm not telling them!" Piper exclaimed.

"Why are you so afraid of getting to know us?" James snapped. "I mean, this is kind of a mixed message. You sent us Christmas presents!"

"They were just tokens, and it was more to make me feel better than anything to do with any of you, okay?"

"So what, you don't trust us?"

"We're _villains_ James. By profession, we've decided to be untrustworthy people."

"True, but I know every one of the guys would have my back if I needed help, just like I'd have theirs. You shouldn't come on jobs against Flash if you don't feel the same," James said defensively.

"I trust you all to have my back on a job, but that doesn't mean I trust you personally. I've heard Digger's obnoxious jokes, and what Roscoe thinks we should do with faggots. You may have been working with Len longer than the rest of us, but you're a recent addition to the larger team-ups, James. I tried commiserating with the others about our family problems. I mean, it's something we all had in common. They called me a whiny fag. And that's _without_ knowing for sure that I'm gay."

"Piper…"

He took a deep breath. "To be fair, you're proving to be different from the others. But you're also a conman. What do you want from me, James?"

James looked surprised by the question. "I…don't really know. Friendship, I guess. Like real friendship, not like getting drunk and playing video games. I thought I had a shot with the guy who knit me a scarf for Christmas. Ya seem a little bitter though."

Piper laughed, though there was a sarcastic ring to it. "A smidge."

"Eh, hanging with supervillains will do that to you. So you work with us, and you're dating an up and comer. Do you spend any time with normal people?"

"Not really. Well, I'm volunteering at a soup kitchen in Keystone, so I get to meet a lot of whinos and transgendered working girls."

James actually stopped walking so he could concentrate more fully on what Piper had just said and make sure he was interpreting it correctly. "You're a Rogue, and you're volunteering at a soup kitchen? WHY?!"

Piper shrugged. "I steal a lot more money than I actually need. I give some of it to my parents, in the hopes that someday they'll stop holding all the money I 'owe' them for my existence and upbringing over my head. I keep enough to cover expenses and to have safety plans for bribing needed authorities or getting aid in prison breaks, and then the rest I distribute to charitable organizations that I like."

"I still don't get it."

"I kinda like helping people. It's nice."

"Okay, I really don't get it." James shook his head, adorably puzzled. "But you like screwing with people."

"I like screwing with assholes."

"You know, a lot of people call Flash a hero."

"The Flash is a self-righteous asshat. He has more interest in puffing up his own ego than in true heroics. I mean, look what he does. His sense of right and wrong is derived from simplistic morals that serve towards preserving a horrible status quo that only ensures the safety and comfort of the minority-"

"Whoa dude, you're going too fast for me. Man, I had no idea you were so into this shit. You've really thought this out," James noted. Piper laughed.

"Well it's all true. I consider the Flash to be a more effective supervillain than any of us will ever be, if you consider villainy to be doing the greatest harm to the greatest number of people. I rob from assholes and spread it out to people who need help but are being ignored by society. I consider myself more a source of financial redistribution than a thief."

"Sounds like a bit of a cop-out. I mean, you do redistribute into your pocket too, don't you?"

"Well sure, I need to keep the operation going. And my tech is expensive."

James laughed at the guilty look on his face. "True enough. You damn well aren't using the money on your living conditions. I've seen your place."

"I should probably get going. I told Earl I was running down the street to grab a pizza…and I still haven't gotten the pizza," Piper said with a little groan. James felt a metaphorical red flag go up, but decided to ignore it lest he spook his friend.

Did Piper always lie when he went out to meet with other supervillains? No…he couldn't get away with it. They teamed up against the Flash after all, there were always news reports about their heists.

Come to think of it, Piper was a little camera shy.

'That'd be interesting,' James considered. 'Piper not having an abusive boyfriend, but an abusive partner in crime. Knew that dude seemed controlling.'

"Alright then, don't let me keep you from Maxine," James said cheerfully. Piper rolled his eyes.

"Bye James."

* * *

"Will you just shut your whiny mouth for one god damn second and let me think?!"

"Since when do you think?! You keep telling me I'm supposed to be the brains of the operation-maybe if you pitched in sometime instead of just being a lazy asshole, we wouldn't be in this mess!"

"For Crissakes you fucking asshole, shut the hell up and let me think!"

There was a loud crash and the shattering of porcelain as their lamp hit the wall, just missing Piper's head. He stared open-mouthed at Earl.

"That almost hit me."

"Stand still a minute and I'll throw something else at you. Will you fucking leave me alone?!" Earl roared.

"Did you really throw a lamp at my head?! What the holy hell is wrong with you?!"

They were interrupted by banging on their floor from the apartment below them. "If you two nancies don't shut up I'm gonna call the cops!" the little old man from downstairs yelled. Earl stomped on the floor.

"Earl, cut it out!" Piper shoved him to get him to stop, and Earl slammed him into the wall, pinning his wrists above his head.

"For the last time Piper, leave me the fuck alone," he snarled.

"Earl, let go! Let go, you're fucking hurting me!" Piper tried to twist out of his grasp, which wasn't a smart move. Earl slammed his wrists against the wall again and Piper cried out in pain, knees buckling as he yelled.

"Faggot," Earl snapped. He let Piper go, watched disdainfully as he dropped to the floor, and stalked off for the kitchen.

"Ow…" Piper moaned, holding his right arm carefully and looking at his wrist. "He broke my wrist. He fucking…Earl, Earl! You fucking douchebag, you broke my fucking wri-" He'd been charging towards the kitchen after Earl but was cut off by a fist to his jaw that knocked his head back into the doorway. When he opened his eyes the ceiling was spinning above him.

"Hart? Oh man, are you okay?" Earl came into view, nervously wringing an icepack in his hands.

"M'fi…" He didn't finish the slurred reassurance, too nauseous to sit up or speak properly.

"Oh shit, oh shit…do you think you can still play your pipes?"

Piper reached up, grabbed Earl's shirt and used to pull himself into a sitting position, now in a level of pissed off he'd only experienced once: the day his father had thrown him out and told him never to contact him, his mother, or baby sister again.

He'd stolen fifty grand from his father before the month was out.

"You want me to play with a broken wrist?!" Piper yelled, then clutched his skull as the effort of yelling had sent the kitchen spinning again.

"Maybe it's not broken. Maybe you're just exaggerating cuz you're all bitchy right now…Piper, baby, we need money bad so you need to be able to work."

"Then maybe you shouldn't have beaten me up you son of a bitch," Piper growled. He stumbled his way to their bedroom, threw a duffle bag onto the bed and started throwing clothes and instruments into it, not really looking at what he was doing in his haste to leave.

"Babe, what the hell do you think you're doing?" Earl asked. He was still holding the ice pack.

"Leaving."

"No. No-no-no, you can't do that."

Piper paused and looked up at him with a little humorless laugh. "Watch me."

"No, see, I need your help. We gotta come up with ten grand or Giacomo's gonna have me strung up."

"That's your problem now, isn't it?" Piper snapped. He zipped the duffle up with some difficulty one handed, picked it up and stomped towards the doorway. Earl blocked his path.

"You can't leave. I can't do this alone, I need you."

"Then you shouldn't have hit me! Do I look like a battered housewife to you?"

"No, of course not! Look, I'm sorry, I lost my temper. Baby please, I need you."

"Get out of the way."

"Piper-"

"Move it!"

"No! You can't leave!" Earl grabbed Piper's shoulders and flung him back towards the bed. Piper hit him with the duffle bag, shrugged past him and ran for the front door. He slammed it behind him and jogged down to the ground level of their apartment building. The little old man who lived in the floor under them peeked out of his door with a phone in one hand and a gun in the other.

"Hey, Red! Do ya need me to call the cops on that bum?"

"I'm okay, Mr. Harris. Go back inside." Piper said listlessly. "Do you have a permit for that thing?"

"Pff. The costumed criminal's asking me that. Good grief, I got the gun when you and that cloud a testosterone upstairs moved in. Well get going before he comes after you. And remember, I offered ta call the cops."

"Thanks, Mr. Harris. Good night."

* * *

"Thanks for seeing me on such short notice."

"Please Piper, isn't it always short notice?" Dr. Kendra asked with a charming smile as she entered the rundown pawnshop that was serving as the Rogues' latest hideout. Piper waved her over to a little battered loveseat with a couple of orange crates perched in front of it in lieu of a coffee table. She set her bag on the crates and started unpacking supplies.

"Someone got a few good hits on you. Fighting the Flash again?" Dr. Kendra asked with a smirk.

"Something like that," Piper lied. "I'm a little low on funds at the moment."

"You mentioned that on the phone. Don't worry cutie, crime doctors don't always need to be paid up front. Besides, I know you're good for it."

"Thanks Kendra."

"I'll just tack on a little interest, that's all."

"Well it won't be long anyway. I just have a few things I need to fence," Piper explained. He held out his wrist. "And if my wrist isn't actually broken, I've got some jobs I was looking into. I don't think I can do them if I can't play my pipes though."

"Well sweetie, this is unfortunately a very broken wrist. But don't worry, I'll give you a nice green cast that'll match your costume and all your friends can sign it," she said brightly. Piper glared at her. She patted his head condescendingly, and he winced. "Oh dear, head injury too?"

"Yeah, I think I blacked out for a minute or so…"

"That's not good. You might have a concussion. Here, let me see your pupils."

Piper sighed and gazed off into space, irritated, while the crime doctor patched him up.

He couldn't have imagined much worse of a day. The morning had started with a phone call from a high school kid looking for Earl. Earl had gotten defensive, Piper had gotten pissy, and then felt paranoid, wondering if his boyfriend really was sleeping with a sixteen-year-old or if he was being irrational. Then Earl had thrown Piper's crush on Trickster in his face and the morning had given way to an afternoon of fighting.

They'd managed a civil silence to case a place for a robbery they'd been planning for the weekend, when shots had been fired and Earl mentioned that Handsome Jack Giacomo had placed a hit on him because of some money he owed the mob. Somehow it had slipped his mind. Piper had just spent all his recent takings on upgrades and a hefty donation to Project Bread, and Earl was as good with money as he was with his temper, so they were almost completely broke-nowhere near ten grand anyway. That revelation had led to their fight, once they'd shaken the hit men.

"All bandaged up. You're going to have to stay awake tonight for that concussion too. Anything else, lovely?" Kendra asked sweetly.

"Well, the back of my head hurts," Piper said. "And my jaw hurts like all hell, but I think ice is the only thing I can do for that."

"Yep. Scoot over, lemme see." Dr. Kendra gingerly patted at the back of Piper's head and moved some of his hair around until she found a little patch that was matted with blood. "Ooo…mm, stitches. You need at least a couple."

"Fan-fucking-tastic," Piper muttered, visions of a dismembered Fury dancing through his head.

Dr. Kendra was nearly finished with the stitches when the door to the pawn shop swung open and voices reached them from the former storefront.

"Always a pleasure, JJ. Here's your cut."

"Thanks Cold. You guys need me on the team-up next week?"

"I want you to consult some blueprints on it, actually. Dillon's already taken a look, but I can do without his take. They're in the back, c'mere."

"Oh joy," Piper hissed.

Captain Cold and Trickster paused in the doorway to the back room, staring at Piper and Dr. Kendra on the sofa.

"Piper? What are you doing here?" Cold asked.

"Patching up, what's it look like? Man, you boys have got to stop picking fights with the Scarlet Speedster. Not that I really mind, it pays me well enough for you to get your butts kicked on a regular basis," Dr. Kendra said as she finished up Piper's stitches.

"When did you fight the Flash? I just got him with a glue pie, stuck him to the side of a bank vault," Trickster said, confused.

Cold grumbled something under his breath and traded a look with the Trickster.

"…so it wasn't the Flash," Piper muttered, giving Kendra a meaningful look that hopefully she interpreted as 'keep quiet'.

"Right, well I'm all set so I'll be on my way. Piper doll, just get me that money whenever you're feeling up to working again. But don't take too long. Twenty percent added every three business days."

"Like I said, I just need to fence some things and I'll have it taken care of before the stitches need to come out," Piper said wearily.

"How much does the kid owe you?" Cold asked.

"For the cast and four stitches, and a last minute house call? Well, house of sorts…we'll call that twelve hundred."

Cold fumbled around in a sack he was holding, took out a few wallets and tossed her a wad of bills. "Consider him paid."

"Len, you don't have to-"

"Can it Piper. I'll show the doctor out. Jesse, can you grab me a beer?" Cold asked.

"Sure." James dug through the cabinets that ran along the back wall of the room until he found the one with the mini-fridge in it. He got Len's beer and a couple of ginger ales for him and Piper. "Here Hartley, you should put this on your jaw for a minute."

Piper didn't say anything, but he did take the can and rest it against his bruise. Len stalked back into the room and glared at Piper with his arms folded over his chest. He looked from Piper, to the open duffle bag at his feet, to the pillow and blanket thrown on the loveseat and back to Piper again.

"So Rathaway, you wanna tell me what the hell is going on? Why are you camped out someplace with no heat and no running water?" Len asked.

"You and Maxine having problems again?" James asked.

"Maxine?" Len looked confused. "I thought you said Piper was queer."

"You told him?!" Piper exclaimed.

"Way to go, Len. Maxine was an alias," James snapped. "Piper, look, I was just kinda worried about you, since Earl seemed like such a douche, so I let Cold know and since he sees you at the big team-ups and shit, I just asked him to keep an eye on you and make sure you were okay. Okay? It's not much of a breach of trust…not really."

"I specifically told you I did not want the others to know I was gay, and you still told them!"

"No, he told _me_ , and that's different," Captain Cold said, using his commanding leader voice, which had the desired effect of making the bickering young men sit up straighter and look at him. "Personally, I couldn't care less if you slept with horses, but you getting beat on like this, that's my business. You're not gonna be playing a flute by next Friday, are you?"

Piper shook his head.

"Thought not. So was it your boyfriend that did this to you?" Cold asked. Piper nodded without meeting either of their eyes. "Huh. Big man, this Fury then, slapping around someone half his size."

"I'm not half his si-you know Fury?" Piper asked, surprised.

"Seen him around."

"I looked into him a little," James admitted. Piper had forgotten how dangerous James was with a little bit of information when his interest had been piqued.

"Can't fucking stand men who beat their women, or men I suppose," Len said with a scowl. "Alright Piper, we'll rework you outta this upcoming heist and the Rogues will look after you until you're back on your feet. You were living with this scumbag, I take it?" Len toed the duffle bag. Piper nodded. "Alright. JJ, you got room at your place?"

"Yep. Piper, you're more than welcome to stay with me as long as you need," James said.

"Really? Thank you."

"No problem. Dude, this isn't what hideouts are for anyway."

"So, you're done with this piece of shit now. And that's not a question. You run back to this douche bag and you can kiss your spot with us goodbye. We got no use for a battered criminal, or a piper who can't play his instruments," Len snapped. Piper nodded again.

"Believe me, I wasn't planning on staying with him-"

James coughed something that sounded suspiciously like 'this time'.

"Good. I'll pay Fury a visit tomorrow with some of the guys, make sure he has some bumps to match yours."

"Len, no! Look, I walked out on him, that's enough. Just, just leave him alone. I mean, it's not that I don't appreciate you helping me, I'm actually really surprised by it, but, but you don't have to hurt Earl, do you?"

"He said they were together for over a year," James chimed in. Len looked a bit disgusted.

"Why would you stay with someone who beats you?"

"Tonight was the first time he raised a hand to me, and I left," Piper said defensively. "This isn't a pattern or anything. I've never been domestically assaulted before and I don't intend to have it happen again."

"Fine, whatever, I'm done. You kids have fun." Len picked up his bag of loot and stalked out of the hideout. As soon as he was gone Piper all but deflated, falling back against the couch with a sigh. James wrapped him in a half hug, giving his shoulder a little shake.

"Cheer up Piper. We're going to have a kick ass time as roommates. I knocked over a toy store last weekend and got some great new stuff for the gamecube. You ready to head someplace with heat?"

"I certainly don't object."


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fury goes missing.
> 
> James and Len have a discussion about feelings.

**Chapter Three**

Between his throbbing wrist, head ache, and James' general demeanor, Piper didn't fall asleep until sometime around four in the morning (probably a good thing, considering he was mildly concussed), and even then it wasn't a terribly restful sleep. He was camped out on a couch that was slightly too short to be comfortable, but conditions were generally better than the hideout. He had a lot more blankets and pillows, not to mention utilities.

James' apartment was an interesting place. Piper had never seen anything like it before. Once, it had probably been a normal aging and slightly rundown early twentieth century building like the place Piper and Earl lived in, but it was hard to find the vestiges of normalcy. Everything that could be painted had been painted clashing fluorescent colors, often in stripes.

For some reason, what should have been a den or second bedroom had vibrantly colored sponges glued to the floor, although when Piper had looked up and seen the equipment hanging from the ceiling that mystery was solved. The Flying Jesse posters along the walls combined with the trapeze swings and the tightrope indicated that James had turned that room into a sort of gym with his special talents in mind. There was also a large bin of different models of air walker shoes in the corner.

The living room had a gigantic TV, the kind that wasn't usually sold in stores. Upon seeing it, Piper asked how James acquired it. "Oh, I saw it in a movie theater downtown. They showed previews on it in the lobby. Anyway, I started dating a girl who worked there, and she let me in after hours. Thing's fantastic for video games and TV marathons. Oh! You gotta come back on New Years for the Stooges marathon!"

"You dated someone so you could steal a TV?"

"I was careful. I didn't even get her fired."

They'd played video games on the giant TV until two in the morning, when James' sugar rush finally wore off. He had quite a lot of systems and an almost complete library of games, so even though Piper had been under the impression he didn't like video games, after an hour of trying different ones they'd discovered he liked puzzle games and that he was good at them. He kicked James' ass at Tetris.

Around three in the morning Piper ventured around the apartment a little more, thinking he might find some extra strength Tylenol or something (he'd yet to meet a costume that didn't have several well stocked first aid kits in their homes). He found a workshop with dismembered rubber chickens and yo-yos laid out on a drafting table, with blue prints tacked over every available bit of wall, and a kitchen with ample counter space and appliances far too modern to have actually come with the apartment, and finally the bathroom, which was almost normal aside from the rubber ducky theme. Piper secured the desired painkillers and went back to the couch to try for some sleep.

At seven in the morning he resigned himself to being up for the day, dug through his duffle bag for clean clothes, lamented not packing more carefully, and clumsily dressed himself, having difficulty with the cast.

Piper took a look at James' bedroom door, considered asking him along, and then decided against it. He'd be in and out, and besides, he could handle this.

"Where are you going?"

"Ah!" Piper jumped, then whipped behind him. James was standing in the hallway that led to the bathroom and the workshop. He was wearing a puffy orange bathrobe and Bugs Bunny slippers.

"Sorry. But dude, your sneaks are on. Where are you going? I was gonna cook breakfast, and make it all big and nice as a 'sorry your relationship ended in violence' kinda thing."

"I've never had a 'sorry your relationship ended in violence' breakfast before. What does it consist of?"

"Hmm…" James considered. "Lotsa bacon," he said with a nod. "And pancakes. I make good pancakes."

"I'll pass."

"Well did you want something a little lighter? I can do oatmeal. I've also got about a billion different cereals to choose from, but those aren't really special. Or crepes. Crepes are lighter than pancakes."

Piper stared at him. "You're…awfully homey, aren't you?" And he finally noticed that in its own Trickster-way the apartment did in fact have a decorating scheme (James was impervious to the idea of colors clashing) and that everything looked well cared for.

"Yep. But I don't get to entertain much. People think I booby trap or something," he said with a shrug.

"I don't know where they'd ever get that idea," Piper said sarcastically. James seemed to miss the tone. "Look, I'll just be about a half hour."

"Okay, so where are we going?"

Piper let out an irritated sigh. " _I_ need to go to a storage locker and get some things before Earl goes and cleans it out. I've got a few things left we didn't fence yet, and I need that money to get back on my feet."

"Don't worry about that. I told you, you can be my roomie as long as you need."

"No offense James, but I don't think I can do many more nights on your couch."

"Okay, fair point. I'll make a guest room out of the gym or the office or something. But if you still wanna go get your loot, that's fine. Just gimme a few minutes to get changed."

"James-"

"How were you planning on carrying your loot Piper?" James asked pointedly. Piper didn't have an answer. "Alright. I'll be right back."

* * *

When the two crooks pulled onto the street the storage facility was on they caught sight of flashing blue lights and James instinctually turned his car into a driveway to turn around. Piper leaned over to get a better look out the window. "Oh for fuck's sake! There are three cruisers in front of the main building."

"Methinks the storage facility was robbed," James guessed as he drove in the opposite direction.

"Pull over."

"What?"

"Pull over! I want to hear what the cops are saying," Piper instructed.

"I'm not getting close enough. I just broke outta Iron Heights, that doesn't count as parole. They will send me back if they see me," James pointed out.

"Yeah, yeah. You don't have to get close, just shut up."

James did as he was told and kept quiet, squirming with the effort of doing so. After a few more minutes Piper scowled and swore under his breath.

"My locker was hit, and they have Earl on video breaking in and stealing all our stuff."

"That's a real smart guy you shacked up with," James said with a nod. Piper lightly smacked his arm. "How'd you hear that anyway?"

"Don't tell anyone." Piper moved his hair away from one of his ears and motioned for James to lean over. He did so and finally noticed the little bits of machinery in Piper's inner ear.

"What the hell is that?"

"I was born mostly deaf. My parents didn't want to learn sign language, so they signed me on for experimental surgery. Now I've got super hearing."

"Didn't want to learn…wow. Must be nice to be super rich," James said with a laugh, putting the car into gear and heading away from the cops.

"It had a couple of perks here and there. Can you keep the super hearing a secret? I'd like not to have to take every surveillance position we ever have."

"You serious? I love having shit to hold over peoples' heads." James grinned. Piper returned the smile a little awkwardly. Right, asking James to keep secrets didn't usually end well for him.

Once he'd accidentally tripped a silent alarm and forgotten to signal the other Rogues in his haste to get out of the building. Len and Mark had been picked up and taken back to Iron Heights. James had seen Piper do it, and caught the 'Oh shit!' face and the reasoning behind Piper's desire to break his coworkers out of jail. Piper had lost a lot of money to the Trickster over the next couple of months keeping him from telling Len and Mark what really happened.

Piper let out another irritated sigh. "James, can you drop me off by that convenience store up the street?"

"Sure. Why, did you need something?"

"No, uh, well I'm not heading to the convenience store. Just someplace nearby." He really needed to be quicker about lying to James. Even Mark and Digger wouldn't have let that one go.

"Ah huh. Cold said you were out if you went crawling back to Earl," James reminded him.

Piper scowled. "I'm not crawling back! I need my stuff and some of that loot was rightfully mine!" Besides, it was only fair to warn him that the cops had him on tape committing a robbery.

"Fine. I'm coming with you."

"I don't need an escort," Piper snapped.

"I'm not negotiating on this. If you want a ride to your old place then I'm coming with you. Piper, the guy's an idiot and a suck criminal. He's clearly desperate if he's going to rip off a storage locker that he's renting and can rightfully get shit from during business hours. He needs your help and he's gonna manipulate your feelings for him to try to get you back. And you'll eagerly swallow his bullshit if there's the barest little hint of a way to convince yourself he's apologetic enough over your fight. So you need me to stand next to you and poke your cast every time he starts to wear down your resolve," James explained.

"He needs ten grand or Handsome Jack Giacomo and his mob's going to have him killed. I knew all that, James. I know he's desperate and that he…he doesn't really care about me. I've known he's been using me. I don't need you to remind me though."

"Yeah, well it can't hurt, right?" James stopped the car in front of Piper's building. He turned in his seat to face him. "Look, if we're friends now then we should probably start using each other as friends. I can help you with this."

Piper slowly nodded. "Okay…but I think I'm going to regret this."

"Hey, at least you'll have a getaway driver if we need to leave suddenly," James said brightly.

* * *

Piper's hand shook a little when he put the key in the lock, but he took a deep breath and managed to calm down a little before walking into his apartment, James following silently behind him. "Earl?" he called cautiously, but he already knew the apartment was empty thanks to his super hearing. "Oh God." His heart dropped somewhere to his knees when he saw the living room.

The couch had been turned over and was littered with bullet holes, the TV had been kicked in, the bookshelf was halfway out the window and there were blood splatters dotting different surfaces in the apartment. James let out a low whistle.

"So I don't think the cops picked him up."

Piper sat down very suddenly in the middle of the room, curled into a ball and started rocking back and forth.

"Hey, hey dude, calm down. You left the asshole, so, so it's not a big deal that he's, y'know…probably dead by now."

"Oh God!" Piper ran for the bathroom and James heard retching sounds. He squirmed and paced a little. It was hard to come up with something sympathetic to say though, because he thought Fury pretty much deserved whatever had happened to him.

He airwalked over to the bathroom for the hell of it and held back Piper's hair while he finished throwing up the burrito they'd gotten at the convenience store. "You want a glass of water?" James asked. Piper nodded, so he hovered his way to the kitchen to get it.

Piper spit the first sip out into the toilet and flushed. He was still shaking, and his skin had a grayish pallor to it James distinctly did not like. He knew he was going to regret this, but it was probably the only thing he could say that would bring Piper out of his funk.

"So, I know where Giacomo's holed up. Y'wanna look into it?"

"Do you think he's still alive?"

"Well, they'd have left the body here if they killed him on the spot, so there's a chance," James said with a shrug.

"Alright. Then let's go."

"Wait, grab anything you need from this place. I think this is the last time you're coming here, dude. And then we gotta go back to my place so I can suit up and grab my stuff."

Piper didn't really answer him, just wandered over to his bedroom and started packing. James watched him sway on his feet, and frowned, weighing their chances against a bunch of mobsters with Piper in a state of heightened exhaustion.

"Dude, you need a nap."

"James, this isn't the time."

"Yeah, but neither is in a room full of trigger happy mobsters." He stepped forward and nudged Piper. His knees buckled. He glared up at Trickster from where he'd fallen onto the bed. "You didn't sleep at all last night, right?"

"I was concussed."

"Yep. And you just threw up everything you ate. You're not ready for an infiltration. Look, just go back to my place and nap for a couple hours. I'll hit up my sources and double check where Handsome Jack is. Piper, really. I know I'm not Fury's biggest fan or anything, but I don't want him to die either… in that it would make you sad."

"…you promise?"

"Yeah. You're way more fun when you smile."

* * *

"Do you think I'm gay?"

Len closed his apartment door in James' face and stalked back over to his TV. It was an empty gesture; he hadn't locked it or done the chain or bolt. Still, a firm response was required for that kind of greeting.

Only James Jesse would come to _him_ with that kind of problem.

"You're not queer, Jesse, you're just living with one. And it's a temporary thing," Len called without looking up from the Combines game.

"But what if it's contagious?" James asked as he flopped down next to Len on the couch.

"It ain't. Least not outside of prison. Why do you think you're gay anyway?"

"Idaknow," James said with an uncharacteristic frown. "I got a thing for Piper though. And since he's a guy and all…" He shrugged. "I liked girls when we did that robbery the other day. Do I seem any different now?"

"Yeah. You're annoyingly chatty."

"Pff. I'm always annoyingly chatty," James pointed out. "At least, by your standards anyway."

"Why the hell are you coming to me with this emotional bullshit anyway?" Len asked, concerned that it might happen again in the future unless strongly deterred.

"Well I can't talk to Piper about it. 'Sides, you didn't freak when you found out he was gay, so I know I can trust you with it. See? I trust you. Does that make you all tingly?"

"No."

"Well it should."

Len tried to get back into the game, thinking James might get bored and leave without stimuli, but the Trickster only got more and more pensive. It was bizarre, and more than a little troubling.

Len bit back a sigh. "What makes you think you like Hartley?"

James bounced excitedly in his seat, glad to be indulged. "He's nice when he's not being emo-"

"Emo?"

"Whiny," James explained.

"Oh. Yeah, I guess that's true," Len conceded. "Anything else?"

"Yeah. He played video games with me even though he didn't want to, and he's nerdy but in a good way, and I think it might be love because when Fury beat him up I wanted to commit manslaughter-"

"It's not manslaughter if it's premeditated."

"Yeah, but they'd only get me on manslaughter. Then I'd bust outta jail anyway. So…does that sound like friendship or…gay?" James asked.

"How the hell would I know?!"

"You're reasonably smart."

"Not with feelings," Len argued.

"True. Okay, so we're two blind guys stumbling in the dark. But whaddya think?"

"I think if you're actually gay then you'd be thinking in terms of sex too." Len started when James blushed. "You…you _have_?"

"Piper's pretty," he mumbled defensively.

"For starters he's not. And yeah, you're gay," Len decided.

"Okay. Thanks for helping me out with that."

"You want to keep it quiet too?" Len asked.

James shrugged. "I've only been gay for like a day. I suppose I should stay in the closet a little bit, get the full experience."

"You leaving?"

"Yeah. I'm gonna go ask Piper out."

"Little soon, isn't it?" Len asked. James frowned.

"What's the point in waiting? I know I like him and he's been checking me out for ages."

"He just broke up with Fury."

"Dude, that was, like, a day and a half ago. Stop living in the past Len. See ya!"

Len shook his head. "If I were a nicer man I'd call Hartley and give him a head's up." He went for another beer instead.

* * *

Luckily for Piper, James' bravado wore out well before he got back to his place. He continued entertaining thoughts of how he'd sweep Piper off his feet, but admitted that Len had a point about giving Piper some time to get over his relationship with Fury…especially since they were theoretically gearing up to go rescue the bum.

He found Piper having a restless looking sleep on his couch. A collection of flutes, pipes and electronic equipment had been neatly laid out on his coffee table, and a spare costume was hanging from the curtain rod. James considered letting Piper sleep longer. He really looked like he needed it. But if James let him rest up then he'd just panic all the more about stupid-fucking Fury when he woke up.

James really hoped the asshole had gotten himself shot by now.

He gently nudged Piper awake. "Hey, dude, I'm back."

"Do you know where he is?" Piper asked, springing from sleep to coherence alarmingly quickly.

"I know where Handsome Jack's supposed to have been as of two days ago. Um…how are you feeling?"

"I napped. I'm fine." Piper kicked off his blanket, walked over to the curtains, grabbed the costume, and started for the bathroom.

"I'm sure I can check up on Earl alone if you're still feeling like shit."

"I'm fine James!" Piper yelled from the bathroom. Then there was a thud and a loud crash. James jogged over and opened the door. Piper was okay, but having a difficult time getting his polka dotted tunic on with his cast rendering his right hand useless. James could only guess how Piper had planned to deal with the tights.

"Need help?" he asked, smirking.

"Nope," Piper said. The sound was muffled, since he was speaking from somewhere inside a wad of kelly green fabric.

"You sure? Cuz I kinda like my hair products not smashed on the floor."

"God dammit, I do not need help! I'm fine, okay?! I don't need someone to always look out for me-sometimes I actually can be relied upon to fix the god damn mess that is my life…" He lost steam partway through his hissy fit and slid down the bathroom wall, sitting on the floor with his legs out in front of him, upper body still tangled in the tunic top. Hesitantly, James pulled it down and helped him with the sleeves.

"I know you can do this yourself, but it'll take like ten times longer than it needs to. So let me help?" he offered quietly. Piper nodded. "Kay. And…I'm sorry. I'm not trying, to like tell you what to do, or say that you're like, not able to do things yourself. Y'know that right? Cuz I think you're pretty fantastic."

Piper didn't say anything, but he also didn't freak out while James helped him with his costume, so he didn't risk further conversation. When they finished, James changed the rest of the way into his own costume and met Piper in the car.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Piper and Trickster team up to rescue Fury.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, look what I finally remembered to get back to cross-posting! This fic is actually long finished and all the way posted on ff.net, but since I wrote it forever ago I'm cleaning it up a little as I cross-post. I'm trying not to change any of the content (however much that makes me wince as I reread it) but I'm fixing things like commas and capitalization around speech tag.
> 
> It's nice to have some concrete proof that I'm a better writer than I used to be...

"So Povich, you any tougher with your tights or you always this much of a pussy?"

"Yeah, cuz, y'know five guys going after one unarmed guy is real big." Earl wiped the blood from the side of his mouth and glared up at the gangsters that were ringing him. 'Tiny', who was of course a lumbering gorilla-esque thug in a designer suit, cracked him over the skull with a two by four.

"Fucking hell…" Earl landed palms down on the cold concrete floor. They were in some warehouse that screamed of housing illicit activities, and was thusly ignored by the cops. His only real hope of rescue was, sadly enough, the Flash, since he didn't think he'd ever see Hartley again.

'God, I'm going to die with my music man hating me,' he realized.

"Hey, hey, Povich, I heard you like to suck cock," one of the other mobsters, Big Eddie (who was almost as big as Tiny) crowed, to the appreciative guffaws of his fellow sadists. Earl spit out a mouthful of blood onto Big Eddie's shoes. "That redhead you was with outside the jewel store yesterday, he your business or your pleasure?"

"You shut the fuck up about Piper, or I swear to God I'll fucking-"

"You'll what? Haunt us? You're a dead man 'Fury'." Big Eddie laughed. "And so's your squeeze. Maybe I'll try him out first, see if I can see what you butt pirates get out of it. Make the little bitch scream."

His taunts hit just the right buttons, enraging Earl to the point where he honestly forgot the importance of being ringed by the mobsters while he was unarmed. Amused, the thugs took turns threatening Earl with hideous ways to sodomize his boyfriend, obviously enjoying their new game. Their boss, Handsome Jack, was sitting on a crate chatting on a cell phone while they played with their hit, and decidedly didn't like what he was listening in on. He stopped them with a wave of his hand (not to mention a full body shudder).

"All right boys, that's enough. Yeesh. I just wanted you to work Povich over a little." He strolled over to the ring of mobsters and looked Earl in the eye, a disgusted smirk on his face. Almost lazily, he trained a handgun on Earl's chest. "Any last words, Fury?"

"Your hairline's receding and that spray on tan ain't fooling anyone, you fucking prick," Earl spat.

Handsome Jack scowled, then pistol whipped Big Eddie.

"Ow! What the eff boss?" Big Eddie rubbed at his jaw while the other mobsters took out their own guns, and promptly started juggling with each other. Fury looked around expectantly: he only ever heard Piper's work-music if he knew it was there already.

"Come on." Before he managed to spot Piper he was lugged to his feet and pulled towards the warehouse exit by a bright yellow and blue blur (at least, that was all Earl could make out in his pain-haze).

"Wait…" Earl tried to form the words to warn the stranger about the men Handsome Jack had stationed outside, but before he managed his rescuer had practically run into them. Much to Earl's surprise, the kid took them out with a normal looking yo-yo.

Huh. He could honestly say he'd never expected to see two full grown and muscular men with guns taken out by a nineteen year old with a children's toy. The costumes must have had a blast trading war stories over beers.

"Will you move your feet?" the kid whined, tugging him out onto the docks. Earl wanted to smack him and ask him how quick he moved after being beaten on by six guys for over an hour, but he was having a hard enough time running without trying to talk while he did so.

Then they came to a sudden stop. The kid pushed him down and yelled at him to cover his ears. He did as instructed, used to working with Piper at this point, and when the noise from the sonic-gun died down he looked behind him at the blown out warehouse. Piper jogged over to them a few minutes later, a messenger bag full of equipment slung over his shoulder.

"Wait for it…" the fashion disaster chimed in while Earl was climbing to his feet. The kid waved his hand and a stream of ground-level fireworks ignited, all in horrible clashing colors. The three criminals watched, now at a safe distance, as the mobsters ran from the fireworks, unable to anticipate them as their hearing had been temporarily injured by Piper's weapon.

"Damn but we put on a good show." The kid slung an arm around Piper, a wide smile on his handsome face. Earl had no idea who the kid was, but he was young, blond, spry and flexible, not to mention a competent costumed criminal as opposed to the third rate loser he was turning out to be, and Earl decided he didn't need the competition while he was already in such deep shit. He tugged on Piper's arm, causing him to break contact with his buddy.

"Babe, you came and found me…?"

Piper's face reddened. He looked down for a moment before meeting Earl's eyes. "I couldn't let you die."

Earl pulled him into a hug, clumsily what with his fresh injuries, and breathed in slowly, trying to memorize every sensation that went with having Piper in his arms. The look on Blondie's face only added to the moment, not that Piper could see it. He felt a surge of satisfaction when Piper melted into the embrace, and Blondie consequently looked like he wanted to vomit.

"Not to break up your moment or anything, but we're not exactly clear yet," the kid ground out, an all-out glare fixed on Earl.

"Oh, right. Come on, the car's this way." Piper helped Earl to their getaway car and climbed into the backseat with him while his friend drove, stealing looks in the rearview mirror that Piper definitely did not notice. So the boy was smitten. Yep, Earl most certainly did not need that kind of competition.

He started coming up with cheery fantasies of different ways to dismember the other criminal, who was no doubt doing the same with him if the look on his face was any indication.

* * *

The criminals returned to James' house, Piper and Earl heading right for the bathroom to patch Earl up and leaving James in the kitchen grinding his teeth with the effort of keeping quiet. That and not braining Fury with a rubber chicken. He _really_ wanted to brain Fury with a rubber chicken.

"Stupid slow moving mobsters," he grumbled, setting his bag of tricks next to Piper's bag of sound equipment on the kitchen table. It was a good thing Piper had taken so much with him; he hadn't been able to play his instruments very well with his broken wrist, and when James had tried, even with the altered tech he hadn't achieved the same results. They'd finally found a wooden flute that Piper could play around his cast, however clumsily.

"Hey guys!" he called down the hall, not wanting to walk into the bathroom. "I'm heading out for a little bit!"

"Okay James, thanks again for helping us!" Piper called back. James flinched at the 'us'. Like he'd wanted to help Earl or something.

"God damn motherfucking slow moving mobsters." He slammed the door shut when he left.

* * *

"I think that's the best I can do until on my own," Piper assessed. He prodded along Earl's hairline, noting a decent amount of matted blood. "Hm, maybe I should call Kendra. How many times did they hit your head?"

"Dunno. Wasn't counting or anything."

"Oh Earl, the last thing you needed was a head injury."

"Yeah…hey, you callin' me dumb or something?"

Piper laughed. "Caught that? I'm sorry, it's just…been a stressful day."

"I hear that. So where the hell are we? This laughing boy's house?"

"If by laughing boy you mean the Trickster, then yes."

"Ah. I shoulda figured you'd crash with one of your buddies when you left. I was just scared that Jack's men were gonna find you before I got them the money. You know how the mob works, they go after your family and shit too…and I don't have anybody but you."

"Earl, we probably shouldn't talk about this until you've recovered. I mean, you do have a head injury," Piper cautioned. Earl grabbed his hand, holding him in place until he'd look at him.

"I'm sorry. I been needing to say it, a million times if I have to."

"It's-"

"No, Hart, listen, when we first hooked up…when we first hooked up I told you about my anger issues. And remember our first fight? I tried to walk out and you didn't let me, you said you could deal. And, and I understand if you do wanna call it quits because I never actually hurt you before, but…but well I didn't really try all that hard to work on my anger before, but I will now. Since I know what I'd lose." He rubbed his thumb over the palm of Piper's hand. "Can you think about giving me another chance?"

"You've got a head injury. We shouldn't talk about this now." Piper pulled his hand away from Earl's and retreated to call the crime doctor.

* * *

James got back to his house just as Dr. Kendra was leaving. "Hi, cutie," she greeted, pausing hopefully on the doorstep. "You know, the boys couldn't afford to pay me, _again_ , so I had to tack on interest…"

"Uh huh." The hell he was giving money to Fury's medical bills.

"There was also an extra fee for silence in that," Piper reminded her. He was standing in the doorway with his arms crossed over his chest.

"Right, right. Well I figured the Trickster was exempt since you're in his house. Okay then, well Piper doll, you know my rates. Toodles!"

"Thanks again, Kendra." Piper shook his head. "Hi, James. Where were you, if you don't mind my asking?"

James held up one of the plastic bags he was carrying. "Robbing a liquor store."

"You know, when most people do that they steal the money."

"I'm not twenty one yet so I can't buy my alcohol, and I make more money robbing banks. Way more."

"You could have asked me to run down to the store for you," Piper pointed out. "I can legally buy."

"I coulda used one of my fake IDs too, but I felt like stealing." He set the bags down on the kitchen table and started unpacking bottles of flavored vodkas, whiskeys, and wines.

"Mm. I had wondered why you were still wearing your costume. Um, Earl's resting in your room, if that's okay, it's just you only have the one bed and he, um, well we can leave…I noticed you don't seem very…very happy."

"Did you at least break up with him? Because it looks like he still thinks he has a chance," James pointed out, aware of how petulant he sounded. Piper avoided meeting his eyes.

"Kind of. I mean…no, not yet. But…but I know I have to. I can't…I mean, if I stay with Earl then I'm out of the Rogues, and I won't be able to pull jobs in Central without that protection."

"Plus you'd be with a stupid asshole who hits you. That's the important part, Piper," James reminded him.

"James, please, you haven't seen Earl at his best-"

"Well his worst is abhorrent! Are you honestly thinking of giving him another chance? Piper, really? I mean hello!" He picked up Piper's right arm by his cast and waved it a bit. "All that and he sleeps around, what a package!"

Piper jerked away, expression irate. "Thanks for the support." He stalked into the living room, dug around in his duffle bag and pulled out a massive pair of over ear headphones. James let out a string of Italian curses.

"You're better than this, Giuseppe," he muttered.

They didn't talk much for the rest of the night. Piper insistently tuned James out with his headphones, no matter how pointedly James played Tetris on his giant TV surrounded by snacks and drinks. James finally gave up on tempting Piper out of his funk with puzzle games and switched over to playing Dynamite Heady. Piper tapped him on the shoulder, and he noticed it was nearing two in the morning.

"Hey…did you want me to wake Earl up so you can have your bed back? We can go find a motel or something."

"Does the walking temper tantrum have any spare cash? I was pretty sure you guys were broke," James pointed out. Piper frowned.

"I was just trying to be polite, I…I'm really sorry, James. You've been so helpful, and I've been such a mess."

"Don't worry about it." He could have worked more sincerity into that. Too damn tired and pissy, he supposed. He paused the game, giving the conversation his full attention. "Look, I shouldn't keep harping on you about dumping Fury. It's your life, and your decision if you want to spend it with a douche bag or not. So this is the last time I'm gonna say this. I'm worried about you, I don't think he's going to improve, and I'm positive you can do better. Okay?"

Piper nodded. "Believe me, I've considered the temper and the…the infidelity. It's just…I love him. So it's not easy to just decide to walk away. I'm going to talk to him again tomorrow. Um…about tonight?"

"The family across the street is in Disney for a week and they have a shit alarm system and no locks for the second floor windows. I'll camp there tonight and steal us a couple more beds tomorrow. You gonna crash on the couch again or are you coming with me?"

Piper spared a quick glance for the hall leading to James' bedroom and thusly Earl. He guiltily looked at his feet to avoid James' scowl. "I think I can handle another night on the couch," he mumbled.

"Yeah, you'd better." He turned off the game, grabbed his airwalkers and stalked across the street.

 

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Piper gives Fury a second chance, and the Trickster pines.

Needless to say, Piper spent about five minutes on the couch before he tip toed down the hall and opened the bedroom door a crack. "Earl?" he whispered. "Are you awake?"

"Numuh…" Earl groaned. "Mm…Hart? Yeah, m'up." He blearily rubbed at his eyes. "What time is it?"

"Two thirty. Um, I'm ready to talk now, if you're…feeling better."

"I feel like ass, actually. So if you're gonna dump me then let's talk in the morning."

Piper sat down next to him, staring blankly at the wall in front of him. "I should dump you. We've been pretty miserable for, what, two months now? Three? Something like that. All we do is fight."

"That's not all we do. The fighting makes for some pretty awesome sex."

Piper rolled his eyes. "You're right, but that's not a very good foundation for a relationship."

"Guess not."

"Earl, I love you. But I don't think I can stay with you."

"Hey, come on Hart, I know things have sucked lately, but I told you already, I wasn't trying hard enough before. I love you too, I'll try harder now," Earl insisted.

"That's a little vague," Piper noted, frustration seeping into his tone.

"Huh?"

"What will you do? How are you going to try harder?"

"Ida know, work on my anger I guess. Babe, I'll become a fucking Zen master for you if I have to. And I'm gonna work harder on making Fury a legit villain. If your buddy can take armed mobsters out with a yo-yo I should be way more impressive with my heat."

Piper chewed his lip. "What about the cheating?"

"What about it? I'll stop."

"Look, you've known all along that that would hurt me. Why were you cheating in the first place?"

"I didn't…look, it's not like I was hooking up with people all the time or anything. It was only a couple guys, and it was only cuz you…argh, Hart, your sex drive cooled off like crazy when you started going out on heists with the Rogues. At first I thought _you_ were cheating on _me_."

"Really?" Piper thought about it for a second. "It's gotta be the adrenaline rush. Huh. You're right though, I did cool off around then. But that doesn't mean you should have looked for sex elsewhere!" Piper whacked his arm. Earl winced and pulled away, still tender from the hits he'd taken earlier. "What if you'd caught something? I've got friends who are dying of AIDS! I don't plan on joining their number."

"All right, all right! The cheating's out. Jeeze, I knew that was stupid anyway. You gotta try a little harder too though. I don't wanna be fucking abstinent."

Piper answered with a glare that encouraged Earl to change the subject, and a return to groveling.

"What do you think I should do about the anger stuff? Self-help books? Are there any classes I should take or something?" Earl asked, all sincerity and concern and something in Piper shattered. He curled into a ball on the bed and started tugging at his hair. "Hey Hartley, what's wrong? Yanno, aside from the obvious."

"I don't want to break up with you…" he whimpered.

Earl gently moved Piper's hands away from his hair and pulled him into a hug. "Yeah, go figure, I don't want that either."

"No, it's, I was already ordered to dump you."

"You were what?!"

"Th-the other night, when you beat me up, I went to our hideout and Captain Cold and Trickster found me, and they figured out what had happened, and Cold has some issues with domestic violence, and he told me that if I went back to you I was out of the Rogues. And if I'm out of the Rogues then I can't pull jobs in Central anymore. And if I can't pull jobs then we have no revenue, and we're back on the streets and I'd rather die Earl, I'm not going back to that."

"Piper, calm down." Earl patted his back and kissed the side of his face. "Look, I don't care if some idiot in a parka tells you what to do and you shouldn't either. It's none of his damn business. I know I screwed up and I'm not gonna do it again. He should just accept that."

"But he's not going to." Piper let out a shaky breath and leaned into Earl's embrace. "This is so fucking stupid. I am so fucking sick of people telling me what to do with my life. I really thought the point of becoming a supervillain was to escape all that bullshit."

"Well it is. Piper? Babe, you look friggin' wiped. Let's sleep on it. We can figure something out tomorrow. Okay?"

"I guess…I should go back on the couch. J-James is going to be pissy if I, um, if we…"

"Tell him to go fuck himself. You just said you were sick of people telling you what to do all the time, didn't you?" Earl reminded him. He leaned back against the pillows and pulled Piper into spooning position, which he didn't resist. He really did look like he needed at least fourteen hours of continuous sleep. "Love you," Earl murmured into his hair.

"Mm," Piper returned.

* * *

When Piper woke up close to noon the house was thick with the scent of bacon. He sat up and stretched, and Earl rolled right over and pulled a pillow over his head. Piper pulled the blankets up around Earl before he got up.

He hit up the bathroom and then went into the kitchen to talk to James, who'd made a large plate of bacon and pancakes. 'Asshole,' Piper thought. He still wasn't in the mood for a 'sorry your relationship ended in violence' breakfast, because he was damned sure his relationship wasn't going to end. Earl was right about one thing: it wasn't Len's place to tell him what to do on this.

Len's reaction to things had been interesting, and blatantly based more on his own issues than anything to do with Piper. What Piper didn't get was James. Why did he have to care so much? It was Piper's life; he should be able to fuck it up as much as he wanted.

'Great thought Piper, being with the man you love is fucking your life up.' There was a ring of truth to it though. Earl wasn't a good choice for him. They grated on each other. Earl was violent, possessive and unfaithful, while Piper made him feel inferior and had a tendency to nag him into further acts of idiocy. But logic had very little to do with any of it. To Piper, even after taking everything they'd been through into consideration, the safest place in the world was in Earl's arms, listening to his heartbeat (which he could hear from across a crowded room, but that wasn't the point).

"Hey, Piper. Hungry?" James asked. He waved with a fuchsia spatula before flipping another pancake.

'He cooks a lot,' Piper realized, and started wondering how he kept so trim. Even with his acrobatics and active lifestyle he still should have been much heavier. Maybe he donated the extra food. Even if he didn't, Piper could probably talk him into it…

"Hey dude, you okay?"

"Huh? Oh yes, fine. Just…distracted."

"Ah, right." He set a full plate of 'sorry your relationship ended in violence' on the table and offered a small smile of support. "Sorry I was such a pill last night."

"Oh, no, don't worry about it. I'm sorry, actually. You've been looking out for me,and I wasn't very gracious."

"So how'd talking to Earl go?" James sat down at the table and dug into his own plate. "Didja find a way to let him down gently?"

"Um…not so much-"

"You didn't rip his heart out, did you? The guy's still recovering. He is kind of a big fat douche, but-"

"James, I'm not breaking up with him."

"Oh." He stopped eating, an unreadable expression on his face. Piper could tell it wasn't anything good though. James tapped his fingers against the table a couple of times while Piper tried to figure out what to say next. Then James exploded. "Well why the hell not?!"

Piper tried to put voice to what he and Earl had talked about, how he was still in love, and that Earl had promised to change and he wasn't being vague… _as_ vague about it this time, and that it wasn't Len or James' decision to make. James looked at him expectantly, emanating anger and concern. And quite suddenly Piper burst into tears.

"Hey, hey! Calm down, I didn't mean to yell." James jumped up and pulled Piper into a hug. "Sorry, sorry…but seriously, you can't stay with him." His voice was so serious, which was unlike Trickster to the point that Piper quieted right down.

"I can't leave him though," he mumbled, hating how weak he sounded.

"Why not?"

"…I love him."

James hissed in a quick breath, no doubt casting about for a counter argument. "Come on Piper, that asshat doesn't deserve your love. Someone who did wouldn't be tempted for a second to hurt you, and he gave you a god damned concussion and a broken wrist."

"He also gave me an identity and a life when everyone I'd thought cared about me rejected me."

"Yeah, well did he know he was doing that, or was he just trying to get in your pants?" James pressed. Piper frowned, because it was a good point.

"He cares about me."

"So what's your plan? Piss Cold off and get us all to turn on you?" James asked. Piper chewed his lip.

"I think we're probably going to have to leave."

"Huh?" James shook his head. "No, no, that's just stupid."

"Well I can't think of anything else. If I'm thrown out of the Rogues it's going to be a nightmare trying to pull jobs without the connections and the protection. We're best off starting fresh somewhere else."

"Len doesn't have to know you're still with Fury," James said quickly, a look of desperation on his face. Piper regarded him with some measure of confusion.

"What do you mean? Of course he's going to find out."

"Come on dude, he's not gonna look into it. He's not that invested in any of us. We just keep it quiet and you're all set."

"You'd lie for me?" Piper had figured Len wouldn't care enough to enforce anything; he didn't rag on any of them over drug habits unless they were careless enough to use in front of him. But Piper hadn't figured on James agreeing to lie. "So you're basically going to own me," he realized.

"I've got enough over you already, Piper. You can have this for free," James said. "C'mon, smile for me. Are you okay?"

Piper wiped at his face and smiled weakly. "I'm better. Thanks, James. For everything."

"No problem."

"I'm, um, going to go tell Earl…that we have a plan now." He smiled at James again before walking back to the bedroom.

James picked up the plate of 'sorry your relationship ended in violence', dumped it into the trash and then smashed the plate on the floor.

* * *

Over the next few days James continued to be a very helpful, obviously smitten friend. Piper didn't pick up on it, but Fury sure as hell did. They often glared at each other from across the room with an oblivious Piper sitting between them, practicing different instruments around his cast.

James helped them find an apartment in a nicer part of town than they'd been living, hooked them up with fake identities for the lease, and helped them move in. He even helped Earl move the furniture in while Piper was out buying groceries.

God he was pathetic. But he'd never fallen for anyone like this before. He really hadn't expected caring for someone to make him this stupid.

Then again, the absolute last thing he wanted was for Piper to run off with a short fuse like Fury. Isolation was the last thing he needed while he was delusional enough to think he could repair his damaged relationship with an abusive boyfriend.

Earl was having fun with the situation. After the two of them moved the mattress into the bedroom he grinned at James. "Can't wait to fuck Hartley on this bed tonight. Thanks for the help, kid."

James narrowed his eyes in complete and utter dislike. "Laugh it up, douche bag. How much longer do you really think you're gonna hold onto him for?"

"Ouch. You're really getting at my self-esteem there. Of course I'm not good enough for Piper. Oh, wait, he doesn't think so. Whew." He wiped at his brow with exaggerated relief. "I'll worry some more tonight while I'm banging him."

James was cut off from replying by Piper slamming the front door open, tripping, and spilling a couple bags of groceries over the living room floor. James jogged into the other room to help while Earl laughed.

"Shut up," Piper grumbled while he shoved cans and boxes back into the bags.

"Nice coordination there, Hartley." Earl laughed.

"Yeah, why'd you try to carry so much with _your wrist still broken_?" James asked pointedly. "How's that healing, anyway?"

"Fine." Piper's expression turned guarded.

'Way to be as subtle as a brick to the face,' James thought to himself. It got Earl to shut up though.

* * *

James started sitting in on more team-ups, blatantly checking up on Piper, who was admittedly doing well. He got his cast off, and occasionally had to wear a wrist brace, but really was fine. He was happy. The shadows under his eyes went away, and he was laughing more, responding to digs with grace and wit and really fitting in much better than he ever had. James almost would have preferred signs that Fury was beating the shit out of him again, so he could have another shot at getting with Piper.

Which didn't make him that much better than Fury, a thought that made him even more pissy about the whole thing. Normally he bounced back from disappointments easily enough, but he was actually invested this time. Emotional attachments sucked. He was so never doing something like this again if he could help it.

Cold hung back after distributing their loot after a particularly lucrative heist (Piper had shone with some particularly spectacular hypnotism on a fleet of armored truck drivers) and indicated James should do the same. He trudged over and waited for the others to file out.

"What the hell is up with you and Piper?" Len asked.

"What do you mean?"

"He's finally quit the broody-angst bull and now you're walking around like a kicked puppy. What gives?"

"It's personal."

"Yeah? Don't let it interfere with work. I don't want to shut you out kid, but I will."

"Okay, Len."

Len gave him a look, an 'are you serious?' look. James figured his disinterested tone had been misconstrued as rude. He'd meant it as more of a 'fuck off'.

"I mean it, Jesse. Snap out of it. You're not gonna impress Piper without your charisma. You look like ass."

"Who says I want to impress Piper anyway?"

"So he turned you down?" Len guessed.

"I didn't even get there. We're 'just friends'." He said it like a curse word. Then Len did something surprising: he shook his head sympathetically and squeezed James' shoulder.

"Sorry, kid. He'll realize his mistake eventually."

"Eh. Maybe I'll stick with girls. This would've just been an experiment anyway. Wanna hit a bar with me?"

"I'm good. I'm already meeting a lady friend to watch the game."

"You're gonna watch a hockey game with a gal pal? What, are you paying her?" James teased, a little too close to the mark based on Len's expression. "Uh, sounds like fun though. See ya later."

"Take care."

 

 


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Earl tries to pull a solo heist.
> 
> Len blows Trickster's cover.

James intentionally skipped out on the next team up, knowing that Piper would of course go in for it, what with him and Earl still being on somewhat shaky financial ground. He sat outside Piper and Earl's building pretending to read a newspaper until he noticed Piper leave (and was exceptionally grateful he knew to keep quiet if he didn't want Hart to pick up his voice with that freaky super-hearing). He tossed the paper aside and went for the fire escape.

Their new place was a trendy apartment in a restored textile mill from one of Keystone's many failed industrial districts. The architect that designed it (James something or other) had funky tastes; he'd incorporated some of the machinery artistically into the building's fixtures. It had a weird, artsy vibe that suited Piper perfectly. Peering in through the window and seeing Earl asleep on the couch in front of a TV, James couldn't help but think of Fury as a blemish.

Hmm…maybe a pulsating sore. Blemish didn't quite do James' level of annoyance justice.

James opened the window and crawled inside. He kicked the back of the couch, waking Earl with a start.

"Huzha!" Earl pulled a gun from under the couch cushion and trained it where James had been standing five seconds ago. He disarmed Earl with a yo-yo from the other side of the room.

"You're pretty slow, Fury," he commented.

"Fuck you, punk! You think I can't take you?"

James sighed. "I just disarmed you with absolutely minimal effort. Do I have to hogtie you before we can have a chat?"

"I'll kick your ass, you fucking fairy. The fuck are you doing here anyway?"

James waved at the couch. Earl defiantly remained standing. Shrugging, James started 'walking the dog' with the yo-yo. His intimidation was coming along nicely, because that gesture was enough to make Earl sit down, however reluctantly.

"What do you want?" Earl growled.

James remained silent a moment longer, as though gathering his thoughts. The yo-yo menacingly scraped across the hardwood floor. "I want your word on something-"

"Look asshole, you may have helped me out with Jack, but that don't make me your bitch-"

"I did that for Piper, not you. Frankly, we'd have done the world a favor if we let Handsome Jack cap you."

"So what do you want?" Earl repeated, radiating impotent rage.

"I want you to promise me you're not going to hurt Piper anymore-and I don't just mean smacking him around. He deserves better than your ugly ass, and he could find it if he weren't wasting his efforts-"

"Fuck you! You don't know anything about me and Hart-"

"There is something I don't get," James admitted. "You've got a weird monopoly on his feelings. Where'd that come from?"

"Luck." Earl grinned at some old memory. "Look kid, I know I've got something good going here. I know I don't deserve Hartley, but that doesn't mean I'm gonna step aside and let you swoop in. He loves me. I'm not letting go of that."

James whacked him in the throat with the yo-yo, getting some satisfaction out of watching Earl writhe on the floor trying to get his breath back.

"I accept that Piper loves you," James continued casually. "That's the only reason you're here. Don't let the bright colors and toys throw you too much, Povich: you have no idea what I'm capable of, and neither does Piper. I can get rid of you, right now, and he'd never know it was me. And it would be oh so easy to seduce him while he was grieving." James detected a spark of fear. Good.

"But…" he continued slowly, enjoying Earl's fear for the moment. "I do love him." He said it quietly before icing over again. "And that means I want him to be happy, so you're safe as long as you're making him happy." He waited until Earl made eye contact with him. "If you ever cause him more grief than _I_ think you're worth, _I will end you_. You're not gonna flirt it up with other guys, you're not gonna let him do all the work, and you damn well will never raise a hand to him again, Povich, or it'll be the last thing you ever do. You win, you've got Piper. So you're going to treat him at least as well as I would on a bad day."

"You…you couldn't-"

" _Try me_. You've already got me nice and motivated."

James walked towards the window to leave.

"Hey, Trickster!" Earl called. "Um, I've never been trying to hurt him, y'know. I love Hartley too."

"Good." James took off, leaving Earl with his TV, in his cool apartment to wait for his _amazing_ boyfriend to bring home a big fucking bag of money.

'Ah well…at least I'm getting better at scaring people. That was almost as good as Batman,' he thought to himself. He hoped his message had sunk in.

He decided to rob something on the way home.

* * *

"James, can I talk to you?"

"Right…now?" James grunted. He was unloading the first of five stolen arcade machines off of a pick-up truck, solo. Piper stood at the end of the driveway, looking distinctly pissed off. Otherwise he'd probably have offered to help, bizarrely friendly supervillain that he was.

"I'd like to talk now."

James got the Simpsons arcade game onto the dolly before responding. "Just let me get these into the house at least. I stole the truck too, so I gotta either return it before it's noticed or ditch it somewhere."

"James, did you threaten my boyfriend?"

"Um…if you're asking me, then you probably already know the answer."

"This is serious!"

"Fine. Gimme twenty minutes to finish this up-"

Piper took something out of his bag, fumbled with it for a second, and then turned on a few small equipment boxes that set up a sound field around the building. "There. We're cloaked. No one's going to pay attention to your petty and pointless theft. I might add, you've been expending a lot of energy on this sort of shit lately, so it's a bit backwards that you'd criticize Earl's ambitions."

"I just told him to shape up!" Of course, that wasn't all he'd told Earl, but if that was all Piper was _aware_ of…

"So you did threaten him?"

"A little."

Piper glared at him.

"Fine, so I threatened Fury. Did he come crying to you or something?" James frowned, unsettled by the way Piper continued silently glaring at him. "Hartley? Come on dude, I was just trying to look out for you-"

"I can take care of myself, you asshole! I don't need you interfering in my personal life like that!"

"Piper…"

Piper raised one of his modified flutes to his lips and blew a terrible note that had James holding his ears and whimpering on the ground. When he looked up again all his windows had been shattered, the arcade machines and the truck were destroyed, and Piper was gone.

* * *

It took the better part of the evening for the ringing in James' ears to die down enough for him to hear again. He'd cleaned up the failed petty theft and all the broken glass and taped up his windows while he waited it out, and so was free to seek Piper out as soon as he could hear again.

He found his friend playing a normal flute on top of a building by the river. The music was slow and mournful, entrancing and heartbreaking. He'd never heard Piper play anything that wasn't work related before. Much as he wanted an explanation for the attack, he didn't want the music to end.

Piper lowered the flute and motioned for James to sit down. "I'm sorry. Did I deafen you?"

"Nope. Well, temporarily, but I'm all good now. Didn't even hafta call a crime doctor. So what's up?" He doubted very much Piper was only upset about James overstepping his bounds regarding Fury.

"Earl insisted on taking a solo job. He wanted to demonstrate his worth as a villain in his own right."

"Oh." James felt a fluttery feeling that might have been a manifestation of guilt…maybe. "I take it it didn't go well?"

"It…Flash caught him." Piper hugged his knees, shoulders shaking with suppressed sobs. "If I break him out Len will know I never broke up with him and I'll be edged out of jobs. I'm never going to see Earl again."

James pulled Piper into a hug, trying to look acceptably sympathetic even though inside he was happy-dancing.

* * *

James wasn't even able to get a syllable out before Len slammed the door in his face this time.

"Go away, Jesse! I'm not talking about 'feelings' with you!" But once again he didn't do the bolt or the chain.

James waltzed into the dingy studio and made himself comfortable on Len's couch, appropriating a bag of Doritos from the coffee table for his use. "How'd watching the game with your lady friend go?"

"It went. So Piper's a brooding wreck again. That have anything to do with you?"

"A bit…he was seeing a loser again, and I got rid of the jack ass."

"Ah. Good." Len shook his head. "So what, is the kid only happy if he's with someone who treats him like crap?"

"Maybe."

"You'll fit right in then."

"Shut up. I treat my significant others like gold. Y'know, when I choose to have 'em." He offered Len his own Doritos. Len scowled and took a sip of beer instead. "So when we talked about this before, you said you're supposed to give someone time to recover before you ask 'em out, right?"

"Oh Christ, you're really asking me for advice?"

"Well I know I don't have a recovery period. As soon as I broke up with Mindy I hooked up with Christine. But I've also been told I'm somewhat emotionally stunted."

"Yeah, a bit."

"And Piper's, like, made of emotions. So how long do you think I should wait?"

"How the hell would I know?"

"Hey, you hinted at knowing before," James whined.

Len closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose. "I don't know, Jesse. You'll probably figure it out when the time's right."

"That's a little vague."

"It's the best I can do! What do you want from me?"

"Is the time right in a week? A month? Tomorrow afternoon? C'mon, I'm really clueless here."

"Fucking understatement. Look, I'd say the time's right when Piper starts looking less depressed, only…" Len trailed off.

"He's always whiny?" James filled in.

"Yeah."

"Yeah."

James frowned. "Balls."

* * *

"That would never have worked if Kid Flash or Elongated Man was with the scarlet dipshit," Mick pointed out.

"Lucky for us Flash was alone then, huh?" James said with a grin, upending a bag of semi-precious and precious stones. He finger combed through them until he found the glassy, fluorescent green ones. "Anyone know how much green K is going for on the Metropolis black market?"

"Last I checked it was three grand for a pound," Digger chimed in. "How much did we get?" He dumped another bag of stones out onto the orange-crate coffee table the Rogues had set up in their headquarters.

James started sorting the stones into piles. "Enough for us all to get a good share. Not sure what we're going to do with the lab created diamonds though. I don't think they're worth much."

"We can sell 'em to Rainbow Raider. The idiot'll think they're natural sapphires or something," Digger suggested. James considered it.

"I wonder if we'll be on the news tonight." Mark walked over to turn the TV on.

"We'll be on the local channels, I'd guess," Piper chimed in. "Are we doing the drinking game again then?"

"Nah, didn't make any Jell-O shots this time," James said dismissively. "Where'd Cold go? I thought he was gonna regulate our shares or something."

Mick looked around, noticed that Len was indeed absent, then swiped a handful of the artificial diamonds for himself. James eyed him questioningly. "Len's been screwing me on my cut lately and Boomer's right. Roy's totally gonna think these are sapphires."

"Guys, we're on!" Mark motioned to the TV. The Rogues quickly found seats on the beat up couch, the orange-crate coffee table, or the stained carpet in front of the television to watch the footage of their heist.

"Trouble in Central City tonight, where a gang of colorful criminals attacked a shipment of laboratory supplies intended for researchers in Central State University's department of Geology. Flash was on scene, but apparently unable to contend with the combined strengths of the self-titled Rogues." The channel ran footage of Flash running in circles, avoiding obstacles that weren't really there, but hallucinations created by Piper's flute, Len's absolute zero gun, and Sam's arsenal.

The Rogues cheered and burst into laughter watching the befuddled Flash race headfirst into a dumpster.

"That was genius, lads!" Boomer laughed.

"He figured out how to get through all our tricks separately, but man, couldn't tell what was a mirror, or what was a cold illusion or music or anything!" Sam said happily. "We've got to do that again."

"He'll expect it next time.," Piper pointed out, but the others ignored him in favor of laughing at footage of Flash trying to punch something that wasn't there, overbalancing and falling on his shiny red butt.

The news cut to another story so Mark flicked through the channels looking for another station's coverage, but couldn't find anything. "Oh well. Guess Picture News was the only one that got video of it," he said with a sigh, turning off the TV in defeat.

"Well I'm heading out," Sam announced. He scooped his take into a bag and nodded at his accomplices. "Gonna tinker with the tech a little tonight-"

"Oh come on Sam, stay for a drink," Digger said, cracking open his own can of Bud as he spoke.

"No, no. I've gotta get these upgrades done and I am damn well never tinkering with the mirrors while I'm buzzed again. Last time I almost got stuck in the weirdest dimension…" He shook his head, as though to loose the memory.

"Suit yourself." Digger sat back on the beat up couch, admiring the shinies.

"Sam, if you ever want to discuss your tech sometime…" Piper said quietly before the other Rogue got to the door.

"Do you think your flutes have that much in common with my mirrors? Hm…then again we just paired them up well enough against Flash. Lemme go get my bag, I'll be right back." He jogged off to his car to swap his loot for his gear.

"I'm gonna get going," Mick said, standing up with a stretch. He dumped his share into a bag of his own. James passed him a couple extra pieces of red Kryptonite.

"What Len doesn't know won't hurt him. Don't let him screw you over too much, Mick."

"Yeah, thanks Jesse, but I don't need it that bad. I do okay." He did pocket the red Kryptonite before he left though.

Piper sat down in the corner with a tin whistle and started playing a simple little melody, trying to coax a rat out from where it was hiding in an old pizza box. Mark watched him for a moment before joining the others at the sofa.

"It was fun screwing with Flash, wasn't it?" he said, which was enough to prompt the others into a round of conversation where they verbally abused their nemesis. Digger found some crappy action film on the TV and he and Mark settled in to watch it.

"Are you going to watch the movie or talk tech with me and Sam?" Piper asked.

James shrugged and joined him by the old pizza box. "So dude, how you doing?" he asked quietly. Piper frowned.

"Better than I was. I'd prefer not to talk about it here though."

"Yeah, yeah that's cool. So where do you think Len is?" James asked.

"Saw him leaving with Roscoe. They both looked pissed. I'm thinking another power battle."

Sam approached them, setting down a duffle bag full of mirror gizmos and tools. He started taking things out as he chatted with them. "Dillon's been impossible lately. You know boys, I think he might actually try to usurp Len's place."

"Top's right about one thing," James said. "We lose nine times outta ten when we fight the Flash. But I really don't think that's any fault on Len's part. At least, I don't think Roscoe could do any better as leader. I could totally see him sacrificing a few members of the team every heist so the rest could get away."

"Yeah. At least Cold watches _all_ our backs," Sam agreed. What neither of them bothered to point out was that if Roscoe did plan a heist that involved a distraction-martyr, he'd most likely assign Piper the post, even though Piper was tactically useful.

"So what's this?" Piper asked, motioning to what looked like a combination between Sam's mirror gun and a super-soaker.

"If I get it to work right, it should coat solid objects with a field that'll allow some of the contacts I've made in the mirror worlds to take control over them. Imagine that on a bank-vault door, guys."

"How's it work?" Piper asked.

"I don't really understand all the details, actually. One of my contacts engineered it, I'm just building it. But it's almost done." He flicked a switch on the gun and it made a low whining sound. "Right, it's powering up, and after a minute or so, I'll be able to load it, then…" He reached around in the duffle bag for a piece of paper with instructions on it. "Hm, and then when it makes, no wait, that shouldn't be smoking like that."

"Huh?" James had been leaning over to look at the gun when it made a loud bang and shards of it went flying in different directions.

"What the hell are you idiots doing over there?" Digger yelled, as two of the three Rogues started yelling with their hands over their faces.

Sam pulled a piece of half-melted shrapnel out of his arm. "Kay. So the gun still needs work. Digger, you wanna do something useful for a change and get the first-aid kit? I need to bandage this and call Kendra. You guys okay? Piper?"

Piper's face was chalk-white, although he appeared unhurt. "James? James!" He dropped down next to the Trickster, who was covering his face with his hands and writhing on the ground, a small pool of blood forming around his head.

"Fucking hell!" Digger tripped over the coffee table in his haste to get the first-aid kit.

"I'll get Kendra." Mark almost ran into Len and Roscoe at the door. "Oh good, you guys are back. Trickster's dying so I've gotta go, bye!"

"Whaddya mean-I leave you guys alone _for twenty minutes and come back to open wounds?!_ " Len yelled.

"Shut up unless you've got something useful to say!" Piper yelled, which was so uncharacteristic of him that Len and Roscoe actually didn't start bickering. Piper had pulled James' head onto his lap and was trying to coax his hands down from his face. "James, please, calm down. Let me see how bad it is."

"Yeah, because if you say it nicely enough his panic will just switch off-" Roscoe started in a tone of derisive haughtiness. He stopped when the coaxing did work, and James calmly lowered his hands. "Right, hypnotist."

There were three good sized chunks of metal in his face, with smaller flecks scattered here and there in the bloody mess.

Mark ran back in with Dr. Kendra, who was somewhat disheveled but still smiling disarmingly at the criminals. She patted her windblown hair and started immediately towards Sam, who was first in her line of sight.

"Goodness me, what did you do this time, dear?"

"Not me, get the kid first." Sam waved her towards Piper and James.

"Oh. Oh, that's not good at all." She let out a sigh. "Weather Wizard, sweetie, I'm going to make a list of supplies I want you to fetch from my house for me. If you take anything that isn't on this list, I will know and you boys will need to find yourselves a new crime doctor, kay? All right, Piper darling, can you and Cold please transfer my patient to a clear surface-urgh. Well I guess the poker table will have to do. Top, hon, I want you to start cleaning Mirror Master's arm for me. We don't want that getting infected while I'm distracted with Tricks. And Boomerang, it'll help me immensely if you just sit there quietly and don't sexually harass me."

The Rogues all busied themselves doing as Kendra requested, except Digger, who mumbled disparaging comments under his breath before scooping up his share and heading for the door.

Some hours later Len drove Piper and Kendra home. Kendra was sitting in the front seat while Piper sat in the back with a drugged-up Trickster, who kept petting his hair and talking about how it was the same color as cheddar cheese.

"Thanks again, Kendra. Let us know if you need anything," Len offered, after pulling up in front of the crime doctor's house.

"You already paid double what I asked for. It's fine. You guys are by far my best customers." She leaned over to peck his cheek, and he actually blushed. Piper filed that detail away in his head.

"Trickster's really going to be okay?" Piper asked as Kendra stepped out of the car. She nodded.

"It's a shame. Kid had a handsome face," Len said.

"Oh, he's not going to scar," Kendra said with a little laugh. "That's why I asked Weather Wizard and Top to hit up S.T.A.R labs for me last week, so I could swoop in on some of the breakthroughs they've made while patching up the Capes. But call me right away if Trickster doesn't look like he's healing right, okay?"

"Sure thing," Len promised. He waited until she got inside her house before driving away. "Shit. When did Mark and Roscoe hit S.T.A.R?"

"Oh. I'm surprised they didn't tell you they were working together," Piper said, even though he wasn't surprised in the least.

"Nope, not cheddar…" James said with a little giggle. "More like soup. Chicken'n'rice…chick'n soup. Tha's your hair."

"He must be on something good," Len said, shaking his head.

"Yep. It'd be nice if he'd stop petting my hair," Piper agreed. James was curling Piper's hair in his fingers and looking at it like it was the most fascinating substance in the world.

"Pretty soup, pretty-pretty hair…jus' like Piper…pretty, pretty Piper…"

"Wow." Piper laughed, blatantly uncomfortable. "He really likes alliteration while he's high, doesn't he?"

"Alliterwhatsit? Nah, kid's just got a crush on you."

"What?" Piper's low tone seemed to make Len notice what he'd let slip, because he suddenly started driving faster and talking loudly.

"So you're volunteering to watch over the kid tonight, make sure you remember what Kendra said about calling her, and if you need her number I've got it but just call me later, nah, of course you've got her number. We're here. Just shut up and get him inside."

"Of course, Len. What could I possibly want to ask you about?" Piper asked, using that tone of voice he had that reminded the Rogues what he was capable of making them do and forget they'd done.

Len took a deep breath. "He's gonna tell you himself sooner or later, okay?"

Piper nodded. "Fair enough. I'm on the fourth floor. I just need you to help me get him to the bedroom."

"Urgh. We should'a gone to Jesse's. His place is on the first floor," Len grumbled.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apparently I hadn't developed any feels regarding the Oxford Comma when I wrote this fic :P


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Piper confronts James about the secret Len revealed.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So...this chapter contains one of my first attempts to write with drag queens. And urgh...I have them hanging around a soup kitchen. Because stereotypes, I guess? I dunno...I was starting to get interested in drag when I wrote this fic and media had taught me that crossdressers are generally homeless and prostitutes, so a soup kitchen seemed like a natural location for them. I'm...obviously no longer happy with that part of the chapter, but I kept it in there because I don't want to censor my old writing. Let's just assume that since Piper's a social activist concerned with LGBT issues that he has lots of LGBT friends and he got a few of them to volunteer with him.
> 
> Man, looking at my old writing is painful.

Piper blinked a couple of times, not quite sure he was seeing what he thought he was seeing. He'd been sitting on the front stoop of the Trickster's apartment waiting for the other criminal to get home, when he saw James walking up the street…kind of.

Technically James was airwalking about a foot above the street in cornflower blue pixie shoes. Other than his airwalkers, he was wearing street clothes; baggy cargo pants and a striped blue and orange polo shirt. He had a giant potato sack thrown over one shoulder with 'Loot' spray painted on it in garish lime green script.

Piper laughed and waved at James, who waved back and jogged the rest of the distance. "Hey dude! What's up?"

Piper shook his head. "You…you…James, what the hell are you doing?"

"Working."

"Obviously. In street clothes. In the middle of the day. Without a mask. Did you send Flash a memo at the police station?" Piper asked.

"Course not. This was an opportunisitic heist." James turned his shoes off and plopped onto the stoop beside Piper. He dug a ratty pair of sneakers out of the loot bag as he talked. "Digger was robbing a bank. While Flash was busy disarming his death traps, which were hella weak I might add, and while he was beating the snot out of poor Boomer I grabbed the loot and took off. By the by, Digger really needs to work on his tech."

Piper grinned and shook his head. "Was it a good haul?"

"Oh yes. And Digger did most of the heavy lifting for me. Poor guy. I almost feel like helping him break out of Iron heights. Y'know, except for how I don't at all. So what brings you around?"

"Oh, um, I just wanted a chat. Do you have a minute?"

"Sure." James dug around in the sack again until he found his house key. He let them in, shutting off booby traps in the hall while Piper took his shoes off and shrugged out of his jacket.

"Have you eaten yet?" James asked. He tossed the sack into the living room and continued towards his kitchen.

"Um, no, but-"

"Cool! I've been adding to this veggie stock for awhile now, and I'm gonna make this crazy good soup tonight." James went for his fridge and started tossing vegetables onto the counter next to a cutting board. Piper hovered by the doorway, watching him with some mixture of amusement and apprehension. James didn't seem to notice. "I've got some focaccia and sun dried tomatoes, so whaddya think we should have with the soup, bruschetta or eccentric grilled cheese? I'm thinking grilled cheese."

"Whatever you want to make is fine."

James peered over his shoulder to look at Piper questioningly. "Is something wrong?"

"Um, no, it's just…"

"What?"

"Well, you know last week when Sam was showing off his new tech, and it, er, blew up-"

"Yeah." James scowled. "It caught me right in the friggin' face. I remember it pretty clearly. Well, y'know, until I was looped up."

"Yes, um, well after Dr. Kendra left and you were all out of it from the meds-"

"I don't really remember much after she stuck the syringe in my arm." James cautiously patted at his face. "Roscoe said my nose is off-center now, but I think he was just fucking with me. Do I look okay?"

"You look fine. Look-"

"You sure? Cuz I mean, dude, burning shrapnel flew at my face. I thought I'd end up looking like Harvey Dent."

"Kendra does good work. Anyway, James, the point is…urgh." Piper started fidgeting with his shirt sleeves. James stopped cooking and finally gave Piper his full attention. "When Len and I were helping you to my place, you, um, were saying some weird things."

"Course I did. I was high as a kite on Kendra's pain meds."

"Yes, well when I expressed some confusion, um…Len let something slip."

James' expression darkened and he went back to cutting the vegetables with a worrying looking grip on his knife. "What'd he say?"

"That you had feelings for me." Piper looked at James ever so briefly before returning his gaze to his wringing hands. "I, um, well where you're straight and all, I figured it wasn't true, but it's not like Len to just say something like that. So I just wondered what was going on. That's all."

"What's going on is I'm gonna rip out Len's vocal chords and turn them into finger puppets. I can't believe he told you! And while I was hopped up to boot! I was probably drooling!" He chopped the ends off some stalks of celery with much more force than was warranted.

"Wait, he was telling the truth?"

James looked up and then went quietly back to chopping the celery. "Mebbe."

"Well why didn't _you_ tell me?"

"Cuz you just ended your thing with Fury and I didn't know how much time you needed. Plus I wanted to plan a more romantic reveal. Fucking Len."

Piper shook his head. "But you're straight."

James shrugged. "I like you though. Kinda a lot."

"No, you're straight."

"Like a lot, a lot. I thought I was gonna get an ulcer seeing you with Fury, and oh did that smug bastard rub it in."

"Wait…really?" Piper asked, radiating disbelief.

"Well yeah. I…I dunno. You're pretty awesome." James smirked before suddenly looking a touch more awkward. "Um…is it a problem? Oh shit, you're not interested, are you? Shit, shit, _shit_. Well teaming up is just gonna suck now."

"James, that's not…I like you too. This is shock." Piper laughed and shook his head. "But if you're feeling bicurious, you don't have to slum it with me. You're quite attractive, really. I'm sure you can find someone more on your level to experiment with."

"I've been hit on by guys before. It's not a curiosity thing. It's you. Piper, I really like you."

"If this is a joke-"

"It's not! You've seen me serious before, well this is me dead serious. God, who convinced you you were anything less than amazing? Was it Fury, cuz I'll bust him outta jail just to kick his ass."

"Let's not talk about Earl." Piper started fidgeting again, but maintained eye contact this time. "So for real, you actually have feelings for me?"

" _Yes_!"

"Okay. And you've noticed that despite the long hair, I am in fact a man?"

"Yep," James said with a slow smile. "Thought about it in detail and everything. And man, I did _not_ know that about myself."

"Ah." Piper smiled a little.

"So what now?" James asked. "Um, you ready to start dating again?"

"You're sure you want to?" Piper asked. James' scowl indicated he was getting sick of the self-doubt. "Sorry. I guess…I really do have a lot of issues."

"Join the club. But yeah, I'm really sure I wanna date you. You doing anything Friday at seven-ish?"

"I'm going to be at the soup kitchen until seven thirty. How's eight?"

"Perfect. I'll meet you there."

"Okay, um…"

"What?” James asked, a hint of annoyance in his tone. "For the millionth time, I'm sure I want to date you!"

"It's not that." Piper laughed. "It's just, that soup smells really good. Is it weird if I still stay over for supper tonight?"

"Course not. We gotta make the most of hanging out as buddies one more night before the awkwardness and the sexual tension sets in. Y'wanna play Tetris?"

"Sure."

* * *

"Looking sharp there, Henry. What's the occasion?"

"Hi, Barbarella," Piper greeted. "When did you get here? I could have used the help when Margie's kids threw up on the counter. We had to throw out three containers of food."

"Hey, I'm a patron of this fine establishment, not a worker. I just help you skinny bitches out when you can't handle the heavy lifting." The drag queen tsked at him. "Now don't change the subject. Sugar, you been primping. You got a date?"

Piper didn't answer immediately, feigning that wiping down the tables took a lot of concentration. "I don't have any idea what you're talking about."

"I'm talking about you wearing clothes that ain't stained and actually brushing that gorgeous red and gold mane of yours, which if there was any justice in this world I'd have and not you. You're looking good, Henry, and it's Friday night. So what gives? Oh you so have a date! Good for you, Henry!" She patted his back and almost knocked him onto the table since he wasn't expecting it.

"The incredulity's a little insulting."

"Sweets, it ain't nothing about you. You should be chasing the men away with how nice you are. It's just that you're always here, or working. Me and Star have been saying for ages that you just need to get out more."

As if summoned, the other queen waltzed up to the table. "Hey girl, what's going on? Ooh, Henry, you look fabulous. You got a date or something?"

"Yes he does. Can you believe he's wearing that gorgeous hair pulled back? You should style it, Henry. Give it some body."

"Thank you ladies, but I attracted this boy looking much worse than this. I am all set." None of the regulars or staff of the soup kitchen, or any of the places he volunteered for that matter, had connected him with his costumed persona. They all thought of him as a quiet and sweet tempered young man, Henry Radcliffe.

The queens would probably die if they ever saw him in the tights and polka dot get up.

"Well I hope your boy is good enough for you. Is he meeting you here?" Barbarella asked.

"Oh girl, just look at Henry. I bet his boy is delicious," Star said dismissively. "Where are you kids going for your date?"

"I'm not sure, actually." Piper spared a glance at the clock. "We were supposed to meet at eight, but he called this morning and said he's pick me up here." He shrugged. "I made sure he was aware I'd smell like donated food and disinfectant."

"Well good luck, sweetie. You deserve a fabulous night on the town, the way you're always busting ass over here."

"Thank you, Star."

The girls headed off to finish closing up the kitchen, and Piper finished wiping down the tables. "Hey, do you guys need help with the kitchen tonight or is it okay if I bust out early?"

"M'all set, Henry. The, uh, 'girls' said you got a date." The cook winked at him. "Have fun, kid."

"Thanks." He snuck out back to the bathroom to wash his hands another few times and make sure he hadn't stained his shirt with vomit or gravy. He really could have used the half hour to change, but James insisted on starting early and Piper wasn't about to refuse him.

He still couldn't believe James was into him.

When he walked back into the main room he found James sitting on one of the tables re-enacitng a celebrity Jeopardy SNL skit with Star and Barbarella. He stopped mid buck-futter to smile at Piper.

"Hey 'Henry'. Where the hell were you?"

Piper gave him a _look,_ and James laughed. Well. He kept the aliases for a reason.

"I was just out back. So where are we going?"

"It's a surprise. C'mon." He took Piper's hand and pulled him towards the exit. "Bye ladies. Nice chatting with you."

"Bye, Gio! You hurt Henry and we're gonna shank a bitch!" Barbarella called with a wave.

"Gio?"

"You were using an alias so I thought I'd join in. Well, kinda. Gio's actually my real name, but I never use it. It might as well be an alias."

"James Jesse isn't your name?" Piper asked, surprised. Even though it was an odd name, it suited him. Piper couldn't imagine calling James anything else.

"Nope. I'm Giovanni Giuseppe. My folks thought we'd market better with WASPy names."

"Ah. So…any hints on this surprise date?" Piper asked. Surprises from the Trickster were either exceptionally fantastic or horrendously awful, and he wasn't sure what to expect.

James only grinned.

 


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Piper and Tricks have their first date. Barry learns more about his Rogues than he wanted.

**A Couple Nights Ago…**

Len pulled up in front of Trickster's apartment just as Piper was leaving. He ducked down so the other criminal wouldn't see him. Once Piper had passed by the truck, Len glanced over the steering wheel to get a look at him, and noticed that he didn't seem to be paying much attention to his general surroundings anyway.

He wondered if that was a good sign or not.

After Piper rounded the corner Len got out of the truck and braced himself to knock on James' door. 'There's a good chance the kid's gonna try to murder you.' He kept a hand under his jacket, where one of his absolute-zero guns was stowed, along with a token of apology.

James flung the door open expectantly barely ten seconds after Len had knocked and his face fell when he saw who was on his stoop. Then he scowled. "Oh. It's you."

"Yeah it's me. What? You can show up at my place and ruin all my games with your whining, and I can't drop by?"

James shrugged. "You never wanted to before. This wouldn't happen to be a diplomatic visit, would it?"

Len rubbed at the back of his neck, glancing away. "I saw Hartley leaving just now. He didn't look upset. Uh…sorry?"

"It's cool." James opened the door wider and let him in. "We're going out on Friday. I guess I should thank you. I got what I wanted despite your blabbing."

"Oh." Len frowned, not sure how he felt about that. Despite having reluctantly counseled James on his feelings, he wasn't sure he really wanted two of his colleagues dating. So far the Rogues had been all heterosexual men with one closeted gay, and thusly in-dating hadn't come up. And they were dramatic, catty, and bitchy enough without it.

"What?" James asked challengingly. "By the way, I'm still pissed at you for telling Piper before I could, so be careful what you say."

"Are you really threatening me?"

"You're on my turf, Len. I can make you feel all kinds of pain and humiliation in ways you can't even imagine."

Since he was already imagining some pretty nasty things involving gaudy rubber chickens Len decided to cede the Trickster a point. "Look kid, I am sorry about blabbing."

"Thanks." James nodded at him, appeased. His smirk slid back into place as he shrugged and walked towards his living room. "I did wanna tell Piper myself, but things worked out okay anyway. I'm a little nervous about Friday, actually. I don't wanna blow it…and he's probably expecting something good."

"Hartley's not hard to figure out, JJ. His gimmick's way more than just a gimmick for him, so just go with music."

"Yeah, but it'd be really obvious to take him to a concert or something. I mean for the first date it's gotta be special. Using the gimmick right away's just tacky." James flopped onto his couch and groaned. "I have no fucking clue what to do, and usually I think of things like right away. Huh?" He looked up. Len had dropped an envelope onto James' chest.

"I'm no expert, but I don't think this is tacky."

James opened the envelope and pulled out a couple of tickets. He eyed Len quizzically.

"It's a small venue by Central University. The guy plays blues on a cello."

"A cello?" James looked at the tickets a little more thoughtfully. "Thanks. I really appreciate this."

Len nodded. He started for the door.

"Wait, how'd you come up with this anyway?"

"Just seemed like something Piper would like," Len said with a shrug.

"Yeah, it's a good call," James said thoughtfully. "You've got a romantic side, huh?"

Len scowled. "The hell I do. I just got the tickets to make up for ratting you out last week. You keep your mouth shut about it-"

"No Len, I'd really rather blab to everyone about how you helped me figure out what I was gonna do on my _date_ with a _guy_. Since I'm all out and proud and everything." James rolled his eyes. He looked at the tickets again. "So how are things going with your lady friend?"

"Huh? Oh, uh…"

"Letting things cool off then? Is it cuz you're finally gonna ask Kendra out?"

"What?" Len snapped. "What would make you think-I mean why would you-just, just no."

"Aw, that's cute! You're all flustered. You must really like her." James grinned. He bounced up and down excitedly. "That'd be really cool, you and Kendra hitting it off. She's pretty cute. I wonder if her rates would get friendlier if she was dating our leader…"

"Shut up. I'm leaving." But Len didn't head for the door. "Jesse, this thing with you and Piper…don't let it get messy."

"I know, I know. It'd be bad for business if we had a tiff in the middle of a heist. It won't be a problem. So you and Kendra-"

"G'night." Len really did take off that time, leaving James giggling in his living room.

**Present**

"So yeah, sorry about changing the plans on you last minute, but I found out about this show and I wanted to make sure we got here on time."

"You're taking me to a concert?" Piper asked, noticing the marquis on the little building. "Sorry, it's just…well, it's…"

"Tacky?" James asked. Piper didn't say anything, but he seemed to agree. "Yeah, I know, I know, but I think you'll like this guy. C'mon. And BTdubs, you can totally use my gimmick to woo me. I'll go nuts for cartoons, practical jokes, or any kind of schadenfreude moment."

"I'll keep that in mind."

The venue really was small; standing room in front of an only slightly elevated stage with a bar along the back, but it quickly filled with trendier-than-thou twenty-somethings chatting excitedly about the performer, many of them clutching artisan beers from obscure breweries.

The opener was pretty god awful though. Piper threw James a couple skeptical looks during the first song, a vaguely worded rap/ballad about social injustice of some kind set to a simple keyboard riff. James cringed, wondering if he'd been played. But despite the horrendous quality of the performer he spun the situation to his advantage, snaking his arms around Piper's waist and leaning up against him so he could murmur clever insults about the horrible musician into Piper's ear.

They did clap politely when the opener left the stage with a final plea to buy her demo though.

"Please tell me the main artist isn't going to be rapping over a keyboard as well."

"Uh…you haven't heard of this guy already?" James bluffed. "I thought you knew everything about music."

"I'm working on it."

When the young musician walked onto the stage, without a backing band and only carrying a cello, Piper made an interested little noise in his throat. When he started to play blues music and sang in a raspy, throaty voice that broke in all the right places, Piper leaned back against James, closed his eyes and swayed.

James inhaled deeply, loving everything about the moment, from the scent of Piper's shampoo to the feel of him in his arms, with the fittingly eccentric music to set the scene. He decided he needed to do something nice for Len.

* * *

It was a mild night, so after the show the two Rogues went for a walk along the river. Piper babbled excitedly about the musician they'd just seen, who was apparently in danger of being stalked, at least from the sounds of it. Some of the language was getting a bit too technical for James to follow, but he smiled and nodded anyway, enjoying Piper's enthusiasm.

They stopped and sat down on a crumbling stone wall on the Central side of the river, facing Keystone. Piper let out a contented little sigh, closing his eyes and smiling brightly. "I can't believe how much fun I'm having," he admitted. "I'd heard that dates were usually awkward."

"Sometimes first dates are. But if there's still awkwardness once you get to know each other you're totally doing it wrong, and we already know each other." James frowned. "Wait, have you never been on a date or something?"

"Earl wasn't romantic and Aaron was worried about people seeing us. He used to just rent movies, and we'd hang out in his apartment or my dorm room," Piper explained.

"So wait, you've never been with anyone who did anything special for you? Like not even on Valentine's day or your birthday or anything?"

Piper laughed. "I've never had a boyfriend who remembered my birthday."

"It's in June." James said, not even pausing to think. His face reddened. "But I swear I'm not a stalker or anything."

"March," Piper murmured, almost inaudibly. "Last year you threw your own surprise party in our hideout. It was pretty memorable."

James grinned. He stood up, squeezed Piper's hands, and then kicked his shoes on and floated about a foot into the air. Piper quirked an eyebrow.

"You wore your flying shoes?"

"Is that a problem?" James looked momentarily unsure of himself, which was just utterly bizarre, especially while he was off the ground. Before that week, when they'd both expressed interest in each other, Piper could have counted the number of times he'd ever seen James anything less than controlled and confident on one hand. But more than once lately he'd seemed out of his element…he was trying though.

Piper wouldn't begrudge him the nerves, not when his own stomach kept twisting from the fear of blowing it. He didn't just have a potential relationship riding on this. There was also an established friendship and a working relationship to think about.

"It's not a problem, I'm just wondering why you'd need them. Are you expecting to be attacked? You're not planning to conclude the night with a heist, are you?"

James smirked, looking more like himself. "Those are just the common uses for these babies. C'mere." He extended a hand. Hesitant, Piper took it, wondering exactly what James had in mind. He wasn't exactly surprised to be tugged into the air, but when they started rising higher than the foot James had been resting at he let out a surprised squeak and clung to James, who seemed to be enjoying himself.

"Put your feet on top of mine, Piper-no, like when little kids dance with adults. There."

"You have remarkable balance." Piper couldn't believe how steady his voice was-they were skimming tree tops for fuck's sake!

"Calm down," James breathed against his ear. "Not that I mind you having that death grip on me or anything, but you're safe. I'm not gonna drop you."

"I didn't think you would." But he didn't relax his hold.

James stroked his hair. "We need music." He moved a hand to Piper's back and started swaying them gently. They had an excellent view of the reflected stars in the river. "Sing something."

"I-I don't-"

"Of course you do. You're made of music. C'mon Piper, sing for me."

"But James, I'm terrible."

"Well I want to hear you. Besides, you love music too much to be terrible. Trust me on this. Please?"

"Fine. But I warned you." Piper closed his eyes and willed away the constriction in his throat that always came when he tried to do this in front of another person. 'It's James, not Mother and Father. He likes me, and he's got weird tastes anyway. He's not going to shriek about having a migraine.'

"Oh, the merry-go-round broke down, and we went round and round. Each time t'would miss, we'd steal a kiss and the merry-go-round went um-pah-pah, um pah-pah, um-pah, um-pah, um-pah-pah…"

James' eyes lit up. He clasped hands with Piper and twirled them in time to the song.

"Oh, the merry-go-round broke down, and it made the darndest sound. The lights went low, we both said 'oh' and the merry-go-round went um-pah-pah, um pah-pah, um-pah, um-pah, um-pah-pah…"

James took over for the bridge, his commanding performer's voice quite the contrast to Piper's scratchy whisper of a voice. "Oh what fun, a wonderful time, finding love for only a dime…"

Piper joined back in for the last verse, harmonizing. "Oh, the merry-go-round broke down, but you don't see me frown. Things turned out fine and now he's mine, cause the merry-go-round went um-pah-pah, um pah-pah, um-pah, um-pah, um-pah-pah!"

James stilled them above the middle of the river, caressing the side of Piper's face with his fingertips. His eyes were sparkling with reflected moonlight.

"You get me, don't you?"

"You do make it a challenge, but I like to think so," Piper answered. "You certainly get me, it's only fair."

"I've been me all night. Dancing in jet shoes, singing the opening theme of the Looney Tunes…I even used my real name. And you keep pace with me. Piper, I've never had anything like this-"

"Neither have I."

"I don't want to fuck it up."

"If anyone's going to ruin things it's me. I do have a history of that."

"Fine, we'll fuck up together." James brought Piper's hand to his lips for a kiss. Piper looked at him for a long moment, contemplating him with a serene little smile before kissing him, warm and soft against the chill night air. James opened his eyes slowly, savoring the moment.

"Wow. That was…nice."

"Yeah."

"No, it's just…" James looked a touch embarrassed. "That wasn't all that different from kissing a woman. I've been waiting all night for things to feel weird, but they haven't. It's like hanging out with my really hot best friend-"

"James!" Piper laughed.

"No, really. I love it when you smile like that. Seriously, does this feel perfect to you too? Cuz-"

Piper cut off James' giddy ranting with a kiss somewhat less innocent than the one they'd just shared. He only stopped when they dipped dangerously ground-wards.

"Right. Still in the air," he panted.

"I could be done with sky dancing," James said. Piper smiled in a predatory fashion and grabbed his ass. "Very, very done. You move fast, huh?"

"No. But I'll make an exception for you. I've been lusting after you for the better part of two years."

That information went straight to James' groin. Piper cupped the results, and the ground came even closer. James swerved them back above the river, moving in the direction of Keystone, and thusly Piper's apartment.

"Piper, jump up a little. Here, put your legs around my waist."

Piper gave him a look. "Now who's moving fast?"

" _No_!" James actually blushed. "I'll be able to run better. Now if I happen to have an easier time groping you, that's just a perk."

"Mm hm." Piper kissed along James' neck and sucked at a spot underneath his ear.

"Aa- _a-a_ …keep that up and we're gonna smash into a building!"

"Fine. I guess I can wait a little longer to properly molest you." Piper leaned his head against the crook of James' neck and enjoyed the trip, even if it was kind of uncomfortable. The warm young body he was pressed up against made up for the discomfort.

* * *

Meanwhile on the ground, police scientist Barry Allen was waiting impatiently for his fiancée outside the Keystone Public Library. Iris was in the archival center, doing some digging on some corrupt politician or other. They were supposed to have met up with their friends well over an hour ago, almost two at this point. He was starting to suspect some kind of revenge for all the times he'd kept her waiting.

"Holy crap! What's that up in the sky?!" a man across the street yelled.

"It ain't a bird or a plane, that's for damn sure!" a kid commented, pointing wildly.

Barry looked up and saw two of his Rogues moving across the city's skyline. Granted, they were high enough above the city that it was hard to see them clearly, but he was pretty familiar with the Trickster's air-walker shoes, and the wind whipped orange hair identified the other as the Pied Piper.

"Well that can't be anything good," Barry muttered. He got out of sight, took out his ring, and once he'd changed into the costume compressed inside it, followed after the two Rogues.

* * *

Piper awkwardly climbed through the window into his bedroom, almost falling onto the floor in the process. He regained his balance and looked back at James, who was sitting on the window sill.

"Are you coming in?"

James hesitated. "Um…"

"Oh. You, you don't have to. I'd just thought-"

"No, I know, I know. Um…I'm just not sure if I'm ready…you know, now that the bed's like right there." James chewed his lip.

"Right. No, that's, that's fine." His tone sounded anything but fine. "I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pressure you."

"Hey, don't shut down on me, Piper." James climbed through the window, crossed the room, and cupped Piper's face in his hands. "I've had a blast tonight and I just want things to stay perfect. But if we get into bed now, it's not going to be…it's probably going to suck."

"I _very_ much doubt that."

"Yeah, well you've slept with guys before. I, uh, I'm not thrilled about resetting to the skill level of a virgin. I haven't had to deal with this for quite a few years now, y'know?" James admitted.

"I hadn't thought of that." Piper took one of James' hands in his. "Well, we don't have to go right for full sex now. We can just do what you're comfortable with and stop if it goes too far, I guess. I just don't want the date to be over quite yet."

"It is still early," James agreed. "And I'm pretty God damned horny right now."

"God, me too. You must know you're living temptation, right?"

"No one's ever said it like that before."

"Well you are. Lust, personified."

James groaned. "I can't believe I've never dated a brain before. That is so much hotter than the shit most people say."

Piper smirked and pushed him onto the bed.

He was crawling on top of James when Barry ran up the side of the building, looped around, grabbed the window ledge, and hoisted himself up to peer inside. He was expecting a nefarious plot. Instead he saw the Pied Piper undressing the Trickster.

With his teeth.

He almost let go of the window ledge.

'How 'bout that.'

The Flash ran three laps around the world before he remembered Iris, and headed back to Keystone.

* * *

"Christ Hal, I've been beating up a couple of _queers_!" Barry moaned. "God, I feel like such a jerk."

"You've got gay rogues?" Hal frowned. "I don't see what the big deal is."

"You've been spending too much time with Ollie, that's why," Barry accused. "You're not supposed to beat up gay guys. It's not a fair fight."

"It's not a fair fight anyway, is it? I mean, don't you usually beat them?" Hal pressed.

"About ninety percent of the time, but that's not the point. Argh, I don't know what's worse: beating up a couple of gay guys or getting beaten by them!"

"Well keep your sidekick away from them," Hal advised. "You don't want Wally getting any funny ideas."

"Please, that boy's as straight as they come. I should have guessed. Rathaway actually looks kind of fruity."

"A lot of super villains do. I still don't think it's something to worry about. It's not like you're the deciding factor here. They commit crimes and you bring them to justice for it."

Barry scowled. "How'd you feel if it was your villains? Sinestro, or…" He couldn't really think of anyone else. "I dunno, Star Sapphire!"

Hal smirked. "That'd be kinda hot."

"Shut up. Hey, wait, you beat up a girl! That's worse!"

"Yes. I battle with Star Sapphire because she's a public menace. Gender doesn't factor in, just like Batman doesn't hesitate to bring in Catwoman or Poison Ivy."

"He hesitates on Catwoman plenty, but that's a different story."

"Feel better?" Hal asked.

"Yeah, I guess. I just really didn't see that coming. I mean, Rainbow Raider, sure, but Trickster and Pied Piper?"

"…is Rainbow Raider…?"

"No, just oblivious."

"Ah."

 


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Piper and Tricks have their first couple fight.
> 
> James thanks Len for the concert tickets.

Piper went to bed, and woke up, smiling like an idiot. It turned out James had been comfortable with quite a lot, stopping short only at actual anal penetration (which was a damn shame because asses didn't come more delectable than that). Needless to say, Piper had enjoyed himself immensely.

He did really need to change his bedding though. He shifted to avoid the spot that had brought him to that realization and snuggled closer to James.

"You awake?" James asked groggily.

"Nnn…" Piper groaned, and buried his face in the back of the thin t-shirt James had borrowed. He wrapped his arms around his new lover's waist and James started caressing his fingers.

"It's almost noon. How late do you sleep?"

"Longer when there aren't whiny blondes in my bed," Piper grumbled.

"Should the whiny blond get up and make breakfast?" James asked.

"No." Piper nuzzled his neck. "You're perfect where you are, whiny or not."

"I like to think I have more to offer than serving as a body pillow. C'mon Piper, don't go back to sleep…" James reached behind and lightly tugged a lock of coppery hair.

"You're a brat."

"Yes, nice to meet you, I'm the Trickster."

"Last night was fun."

"It was. I'm glad I stayed."

"Me too." Piper yawned. "Do you think I should keep the TV in here or by the couch?" After their physical-playing they'd moved Piper's TV into the bedroom for some video games, cartoons, and cuddling. Piper figured he was going to start using the device more often.

"I'll steal you another one," James said dismissively. "I don't get why you've only got the one anyway."

"I don't watch a lot of TV. I do like playing video games though. And I never realized how much good music there was in the Looney Tunes."

"That's why they're Looney _Tunes_ and Merry _Melodies_." James said with a laugh. "I've been collecting theatrical cartoons for years. I've got loads more I could show you."

"Sounds like a plan." Piper kissed James' neck and skimmed his hands under the t-shirt, feeling along his tight tummy. "I can't wait until you're ready for the things I can show you."

"I'll let you know. You do amazing things with your hands. And mouth. I just need a little more…practice."

"Practice…I like the sound of that."

"Thought you might."

* * *

James finally did get a chance to sneak over to Piper's kitchen while the damn bed-head was taking a shower. It was now well past noon and he was starving. A morning of fooling around should be followed by a big breakfast, or so he thought.

James let out a little yelp when he saw the state of Piper's kitchen, which would not be supplying a breakfast of any kind.

Most of the available counter space was crowded with opened cans of soup, some with spoons stuck in them. The cabinets were all but empty, with the occasional box of instant rice or packet of oatmeal. The sink was full of crusted old dishes, the trash barrel was overflowing with take-out containers and paper plates, and the fridge was barren.

The freezer was well stocked with Hot Pockets though.

"James? Are you okay?" Piper called.

"Oh, yeah!" James yelled back. "Just wondering how you're still alive!"

"Huh?" Piper walked in, toweling off his hair. He was wearing a baggy pair of sweat pants and fuzzy green slippers.

James motioned violently towards the Hot Pockets. "How is your rectum still functioning?! Is this shit really what you eat when I don't feed you?"

"James, calm down." Piper laughed. He started back towards his bedroom, patting his hair with the towel again. "You don't spend a lot of time with hackers, do you?"

"You're gonna die. And I don't mean in the metaphysical 'we're all dying' kinda way."

"I take multivitamins to make up for my abhorrent nutritional habits. Besides, you use a lot of oil when you cook, and that's not good for you either."

"I use extra virgin olive oil! Olive oil is fantastic for you. You really have no idea what you're talking about, do you? If your body doesn't take in nutrients gradually throughout the day it's just gonna piss them back out again!"

Piper emerged from his room with a BB King t-shirt and his hair pulled back in a ponytail. He looked confused. "You're not teasing, are you? James, are you actually worried?"

"The crusted food in your sink is drawing rats. No, I'm thrilled I'm falling for an idiot who can't take care of himself."

"I can take care of myself!"

James answered with a glare.

"I can! Just because I don't care to cook-"

"Even people who suck at cooking aren't necessarily going to kill themselves! There are people in third world countries eating better than you!"

"I know, because _I steal the funds to feed them_! Because I have better things to do than stand in front of a stove!" Piper yelled, losing his temper.

"You're gonna help a lot of people in an early grave, aren't you Piper? Thought everything out, huh?" James yelled back.

"I'm taking the vitamins, what else do you want me to do?"

James stormed into the kitchen, found the trash bags, and started clearing Piper's counter and sink.

"What are you doing?" Piper snapped.

"Taking out your trash. Then I'm going home, getting some of my spare supplies and bringing them here, and then I'm going food shopping. You are _so_ not allowed to drop from a preventable disease now that I've finally got you."

"Wait, I just got _out_ of a controlling relationship. I'm not starting this one off with you taking over my kitchen! I mean, you might as well just move in!"

James didn't answer. He hefted two full trash bags over his shoulder and left out the window via jet shoes.

* * *

It didn't take long for Piper to regret yelling at James. Clearly it had been too long since he'd had someone in his life that genuinely cared about him if he saw manifestations of concern as an attack on his capabilities.

He spent a good chunk of the afternoon by an open window with a flute, hoping James would come back so they could discuss their fight. But afternoon gave way to evening with no sign of the Trickster and Piper had places to go.

Sighing, he found his sweatshirt and shoes and left for the homeless shelter.

He got back a few hours later, weary and depressed, certain he'd ruined things with a perfect boyfriend (and lost a deep friendship) before it had begun. He had a bag of fast food with him since he'd barely eaten all day, and the wafting odor of grease was only adding to his self-pity.

When he got to his building he noticed that the lights were on in his apartment. They hadn't been when he'd left, which meant a break-in. The prospect of a fight was annoying, but there was also the possibility that it was James up there. Feeling hopeful, Piper walked in, and noticed that there were candles burning in his living room.

His kitchen had been transformed. He now had a real dining table, not to mention appliances, knives, cutting boards, pot holders, measuring cups, and all manner of things he'd never thought to purchase. Plus everything had been cleaned and sterilized (even though the comment about rats had been a _total_ exaggeration).

James was standing in front of the stove stirring a pot of something wonderful smelling. He looked over his shoulder, throwing Piper an apologetic smile before turning back to his food.

"Hi," Piper greeted. His hand involuntarily tightened on the fast food bag. He'd never noticed how enticing a gorgeous Italian could look in front of a stove, which made him feel all kinds of stupid.

"Hey, Piper. So I hope you don't mind me redoing your kitchen, but since you didn't really use it I thought you might not care…" James stopped when he felt a hand lightly graze his hip. "We got mad over nothing, didn't we?"

"I hope so," Piper murmured. "I'd hate to chase you away after one fantastic date." He balled up the fast food bag and tossed it in his (for once) empty garbage can. "What are you making?"

"Curried lentil soup. I can't tell, are you a vegetarian?"

"Yep. If the grain used to feed livestock for the benefit of the wealthy minority were redistributed, world hunger could easily be eliminated."

"Ah. Then…it's extra important you take care of yourself. I mean, you could get serious iron and protein deficiencies." James turned away from the stove and rested his head on Piper's shoulder. "Will you let me cook for you?"

Piper inhaled deeply, smelling the enticing curry soup and citrus hair gel. It was an odd but not unpleasant combination.

"No, I'm completely wed to the idea of malnourishment. In fact, I think I should do the cooking from here on out. Come on James, I can't even evenly heat a Hot Pocket."

James smiled. "Cool. Cuz I threw out the Hot Pockets."

"Hey!"

* * *

That night when Len trudged in from a small heist that had ended in a close shave with the Flash he found a cooler on his front step. "Rrnmmghr," Len grumbled. He was tired, nauseated, and sore. He was all set with excitement for the night.

He eyed the cooler warily before noticing the obnoxious orange envelope on top of it. The cooler lid was colored in blue and yellow stripes.

Len opened the envelope first and found a note from James: _Thanks for the tickets, things went awesome ;) I whipped up some gelato for you (from scratch you lucky bastard) as a way to say thanks and to spread the love. Maybe you should share some with the hot doctor :) :) :)_

Len shook his head. Why James thought that he had a thing for Kendra…it was just, just…absolutely true.

And damn Tricks for noticing.

Len was fully aware he wasn't an attractive man, and that he didn't have much to offer the confident young woman. It just wasn't that often pretty girls kissed his cheek and called him sweetie. It had gone to his head a little.

He sat down on the stoop and took out one of the containers of gelato. They were stored amongst crushed ice along with a bottle of wine (some of the fancy stuff he always walked past on his beer runs), with two glasses and two spoons taped to the lid of the cooler. Len got one of the spoons out and ate thoughtfully for a minute.

It probably wouldn't hurt to _ask_ Kendra if she liked gelato…

 


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Rogues work out a plan to defend their crime doctor.

"Phone."

…

"Phone."

…

" _Phone_." James punctuated the groan by poking Piper in the ribs. Piper pulled a pillow over his head and rolled as far from James as mattress constraints would allow. James rolled his eyes.

"If you don't answer it, I will. The guy keeps calling back," James threatened. Piper responded with an incoherent noise and cocooned himself in the blankets. "A morning person my baby ain't." Sighing, James picked up the phone. "Hello?"

"Jesse?" It was Cold, which was probably for the best. James wasn't looking forward to explaining to the other Rogues why he was frequenting Piper's apartment so damn much these days (luckily none of them really seemed to care...or notice).

"Yeah Len. Piper's indisposed. Can I take a message?"

"Get him up, get your gear, and meet at the hide out. We've got a situation."

James slouched down in the bed and let out a full-fledged whine. "I don't wanna! It's late, or very, very early to be more accurate. I only picked up the phone to make it stop ringing!"

"Well you shoulda unplugged it, kid. If I don't see you and Piper here in twenty minutes we'll come and get you." Len hung up before James could protest any further.

"Motherfucker. Hey Pookie, get up. Apparently we've got a situation."

* * *

**Earlier That Night…**

Len pulled up in front of Kendra's house, put his car in park, and continued to sit in the driver's seat for another ten minutes. The lights were on in Kendra's living room; she was home, she was up, and if he was going to make a move this was the best opportunity he could hope for.

Then the living room window blew out in a dazzling flash of green light. Len pulled an absolute zero gun from his glove box and ran through the debris to the living room without further hesitation.

Kendra was crouched behind her tipped over sofa with her hands over her head. She was wearing pajamas and slippers and there was a smoldering book and a smashed bottle of wine in the remnants of her coffee table. Her assailant had clearly interrupted a private night in.

"You son of a bitch! Get off of my property!" Kendra yelled.

Len turned around, aiming his gun where Kendra had been directing her attention. 'No fucking way.'

He was facing Lex Luthor in full robotic green and purple armor (some of which was smoking). He looked exceptionally pissed off, probably owing to the fact that he had a sizable shard of kryptonite embedded in his forehead like a grotesque bindi, with blood trickling into his eyes.

Luthor trained his arm cannon on Len. "I'm in a rush so I'll generously allow you your life if you leave now. The doctor's already got a patient-"

"The hell I do, Luthor! I told you, I don't work Metropolis anymore!" Kendra shouted.

"That's why I came here, you insolent cow, now get to work!"

"Watch what you say to the lady," Len snapped. Luthor eyed him curiously.

"Who exactly are you?" he asked, dripping disdain. "The henches and grunts know their place in Metropolis."

"I ain't no friggin' hench-"

"Cold, it's okay, I can handle this," Kendra called from somewhere in the general vicinity of the overturned sofa. Luthor didn't seem to notice her move, such was his amazement at being threatened by a supervillain he clearly viewed as beneath him.

" _Captain Cold_?" he sneered. "The poor man's Mr. Freeze? I have it on good authority you can't even handle small time heists without being humiliated by a simple minded hero with only one power. You're out of your league, now leave us be. I have business with the doctor and it certainly doesn't concern you."

"The lady doesn't seem to want your business. You're in my city, Luthor, so show her some respect."

"Or what, you'll slip an ice cube down my back?" he asked with an obnoxious laugh.

Len's finger twitched on the trigger. He really did want to show the smug bastard what he was capable of, but that would have to wait for another day. Kendra had crept up behind Luthor and placed a flat metal oval onto his suit. Len hadn't the faintest idea what it would do to the robo-suit, but as the disc had a black bat painted on it he figured it would be nasty.

"Duck!" Kendra yelled, darting away from Luthor. Len dove for her, shooting up an ice wall to protect them as Luthor's suit started violently jerking and shooting sparks. He shrieked in agony as the bat-disc did its work. There was another brilliant flash of light, and when the spots cleared from Len's vision he saw Luthor slumped over in his charred robo-suit.

"Thanks for buying me the time. You're a doll." Kendra kissed his cheek.

"No problem." Len crawled out from behind the ice and checked Luthor for a pulse. "The asshole's still alive."

Kendra sighed. "Well I can't say I'm surprised. The Batman doesn't kill, after all…but it's still disappointing."

"Yeah, speaking of which," Len picked up the disc, which was still shiny and uncharred. "Where'd you get this thing?"

"A grateful client." She pocketed the disc, walked up to Luthor, and stuck him with a syringe. "Just keeping him out a bit longer. I think my best bet is to toss him in front of the police department and let them transfer him back to Metropolis."

"You can't drive up in your car. Someone could see your plates. My car's already dirty. I'll do it."

"I don't mind the risk you know. I am a criminal too," she said with a frown.

"Yeah, but they don't have you on record yet. You're not going to jail on my watch. How long's he out for anyway?"

"At least a few hours."

"All right. Can you help me lug this thing to the car?"

* * *

**Presently…**

Piper and Trickster walked into the condemned furniture store that was serving as the Rogues' current hideout. The puke colored love seat and orange crate furniture had been dragged along from the abandoned pawn shop, but other than that the accessories were new. Digger had procured them a larger but somehow crappier TV than their old one, and they had a full sized functioning refrigerator this time. They'd also gotten a new poker table and some lawn furniture to go with the orange crates and love seat.

Sam, Digger, Mick, and Mark were gathered around the room, looking as sluggish and cranky as Piper and James felt. Only Len looked reasonably alert, but surlier than the rest of them combined. Dr. Kendra was napping on the love seat, and the criminals gave her a respectful berth of space.

James and Piper exchanged a look, noting a distinct lack of Roscoe's presence and wondering if he and Len were butting heads again.

"So what's the situation?" James asked. Len tilted his head towards Kendra.

"Lex Luthor blew up half her house," Mark explained. "We're all pitching in to help fix the place up. You guys gonna contribute to the pot?" He motioned towards a coffee can on the coffee table that had been stuffed with wads of hundreds.

"Yeah, I can throw some cash in." James agreed, while Piper nodded. "Why's Luthor gunning for a crime doctor?"

"Before she settled here she used to work Gotham and Metropolis," Len said.

Sam let out a low whistle. "Those are contacts one can do without."

"Agreed." Len started pacing. "She's not saying much, but I've gathered this isn't the first time a former client's sought her out and had a hard time hearing no. What's worse, we dumped Luthor with the cops thinking they'd ship him back to Metropolis where they know how to deal with him, but they just sent him to Iron Heights."

"Ah. So he'll be out in time for the morning news?" James joked.

"Exactly." Len scowled. "Now, she's a tough broad but I think we owe it to her to make sure she stays safe. It's a good bet Luthor's gonna come after her again."

"I don't know Snart, she's a nice girl an all…" Digger let out a yawn. "Scuse me, but I don't see going out of our way for her."

"Y'know somehow I don't think Kendra'd want you for a body guard anyway, Digger." James laughed. Digger glared at him.

"So what, you want us to take turns tailing her or something?" Mick asked.

"You don't need to tail me." Kendra groaned.

"I'd rather you not die, personally," Mark chimed in. "Our last crime doctor was terrible. All he did was give us amoxicillin, no matter what our injury was."

"I used it to turn my hair pink," James said brightly.

"We remember," Piper said, rolling his eyes.

Kendra snorted. "I'm very touched by your concern, but trust me boys, I'm fine. Part of the reason Luthor's so insistent with me is just wounded male ego."

"Huh?" Digger asked.

"We used to date," she translated.

"You got a thing for the Mr. Clean look?" James asked, suddenly fidgety. His eyes darted towards Len, who looked somehow surlier.

"Actually, it was more of a confidence thing. And it was a huge mistake and is largely responsible for my policy against dating my clients," Kendra explained. James spared another glance to Len, and saw him visibly deflate. He felt a little bad about goading him to ask Kendra out.

"I don't think I really need to worry about Lex. He's just making a lot of noise to get attention. Men like that aren't used to being told no," she continued.

"You said Two Face came after you once too. Didja date him too or something?" Len asked, scowling.

"Two Face?" She laughed. "The no-dating policy would have started much earlier if I'd tried it with _any_ of the Gotham guys. Two Face just wanted medical attention. Same with Poison Ivy, Riddler, Catwoman, Atomic Skull, Scarecrow, Toyman, and the Mad Hatter." The more names she rambled off the more convinced the Rogues became that they needed to protect their doctor.

"I can take the first shift," Mick volunteered.

* * *

Piper went straight for his bed as soon as they got back in from the Rogues meeting, but James was annoyingly alert and awake. He sat down on the end of the bed and bounced it a little. "We should do something fun when it's our turn to guard Kendra. D'ya wanna take a trip somewhere?"

"I want to sleep," Piper responded, pulling a pillow over his head. James bounced the mattress a little harder, and then dodged when Piper blindly kicked at him.

"C'mon Pookie, we almost got five hours of sleep before Cold called, that's enough-"

"I told you James, _do not call me Pookie_! It's an idiotic pet name and I don't like it! And if you can't sleep then go to your own apartment!"

James crawled under the blankets and curled up next to Piper. "But you're my pookie…and I like it here."

"I need at least another two hours of sleep before I can deal with you." Piper groaned. James kissed his nose.

"I'll be good."

Their cuddling was interrupted by pounding on the door. Piper rolled away from James into a blanket cocoon and let out a scream muffled by his pillow. James got up to answer the door.

Len was standing in the hallway looking crestfallen.

"Hey dude. S'up?"

"Did you know Kendra doesn't date clients? Because I didn't…she never said anything about it, right? Do you think she'd reconsider if I stopped being a client? The amoxicillin wasn't so bad."

James opened the door wider. "C'mon in. Let's talk about our 'feelings'."

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This story continues in the next fic in the series, Late Morning Lullaby. I'll have that posted soon-ish :)
> 
> Thanks for reading, and feel free to leave me a comment to let you know what you think. Kudos are pretty rad too!


End file.
